Night Crumbs

So how did Peloton decide to deal with their PR crisis, including the Chris Noth mess? Answer: Distract everyone with Christopher Meloni’s nipples! In a new Peloton ad, Chris Meloni poked fun (cut to a bunch of thirsty tricks running off to legally change their name to Fun in hopes that Chris Meloni pokes them next) at his own stories about how he likes to exercise while taint-out naked. He lifts weights while “naked,” does squats while “naked,” and goes ass up “naked” while doing another workout. And I’ve got naked in quotes because there’s a cock-blocking censor box on him the entire time. So if you listen closely right now, you can hear an entire nation screaming in unison, “Fuck you, pixelated box!”  – TVLine

At The Gray Man premiere in Hollywood, Ryan Gosling served “hairstylist circa 1980s Miami who woke up with hungover eyes that were so blurry he didn’t realize his blazer and pants didn’t match when he got dressed” hotness – Lainey Gossip

In 2019, Constance Wu got shit after she tweeted she was upset about her show Fresh Off The Boat getting renewed, and that was quickly followed by stories about her being a diva on the Hustlers set. Constance now says that the backlash and a few DMs made her feel like an embarrassment to the Asian American community and she attempted suicide – Just Jared

Natalie Portman, who is vegan, says that Chris Hemsworth is a considerate gentleman and didn’t eat meat for a day before their kissing scene for Thor: Love and Thunder. And that was a huge sacrifice for Thor to make because if he doesn’t shove half a cow in his eating hole every hour on the hour, one of his bulging muscles probably deflates a bit – Celebitchy

Alfonso Ribeiro will attempt to share the spotlight with noted spotlight hogger Tyra Banks as the new co-host of Dancing with the Stars. Good luck with that, Carlton – SOW

The world’s got another Jonas in it because Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner welcomed their second kid – Entertainment Tonight

Here is the trailer for the Showtime series remake of American Gigolo, and no, nobody asked for that, but throw in Jon Bernthal’s nipples and cum gutters, and suddenly I’m pressing the damn play button – Pajiba

Pic: YouTube