Hot Slut Of The Day!
India Hodge, the cat who was forced to marry her human in a bid to avoid eviction!
Humans marrying their pets is nothing new, because we humans are always proving that we’re masters at high potent fuckery and we also love dragging our pets into tortuous human traditions like getting married. But Deborah Hodge from the UK says that she married her cat India because she’s had to rehome pets in the past over the rules of landlords and doesn’t want that to happen again. So Deborah thinks that because India is now her pussy wife, it’ll make it harder for landlords to threaten eviction over her having a pet. This story has led to my brain burping up a thousand questions and many of them are still unanswered. But the question, “How does India feel about this?” was answered by India throwing a glare that says, “We shall only part by death, you say? Don’t tempt me, trick!”
Deborah Hodge tells SWNS (via Metro UK) that she’s been forced to give up three pets in the past after her landlords let her know that they didn’t want pets living in their properties. At the last place that Deborah lived, her landlord didn’t like her two Huskies living there so she had to give them up. This is where the questions started to pour out of my brain. Did the landlord know she had pets before she moved in? Was there a contract? Why didn’t she just leave and move into a place that allows pets? But those questions may be too logical for a batshit attention-getting story like this.
The landlord of Deborah’s current place also doesn’t allow pets, which is why she had to give up her last cat Jamal. But after begging her current landlord to let her get another cat, he gave in and she rescued India. So it seemed like Deborah and India were going to live in bliss in a pet-friendly apartment, but then she lost her job and she’s not sure if she’ll be able to pay her rent next month and she may get evicted. But Deborah, who also has two human children, came up with a plan. Deborah made an honest pussy out of India by marrying her to show future landlords that their bond can’t be broken.
Deborah, an unemployed mum from Sidcup, said: ‘She is fundamentally the most important thing in my life after my children.
‘By marrying India, I need any future landlords to know that we come as a package and we cannot be separated under any circumstances as she is as important to me as the children.
‘I refuse to be parted with her. I’d rather live on the streets than be without her.’
After reading that last part, Debora’s past pets are probably like, “No wonder I smell like chopped liver.”
Again, I’m not sure how marrying her cat is going to move landlords to accept pets. Because when she says to a prospective landlord, “Hello, I am Deborah Hodge and this is my cat wife India Hodge,” they may nervously laugh and say, “Okay, I’ll let you know about the apartment soon,” before backing away and deleting her number from their phone FOREVER! And Deborah knows she comes off crazy and her friends know she’s crazy too but she doesn’t care.
Here’s Deborah right after marrying India and if you’re wondering how she achieved those teased ponytails for her wedding look, then skip to the 0:35 mark. India probably clawed at Deborah’s hair while trying to get away!
This will definitely make those people who scream, “gAY coUPLeS GeTtiNG mARrIED iS goiNG tO LEAd To HUManS maRRying THeiR pETs!!!”, lose their heads. Because not only did a human marry her pet, but she married a girl pet. It’s an interspecies lesbian wedding! But seriously, hopefully, these two live in wedded harmony in a pet-friendly love palace forever, because can you just imagine getting a divorce from a cat?! They love to get revenge and love to get messy. So Deborah and India’s divorce would be so messy that it’d make Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt say, “Calm down, India.” Well, at least they’d agree on something for once.
Pic: YouTube