March’s Hot Sluts Of The Month Are…

The other Hot Slut of the Month finalists were no match for the soul-melting union of Sisu and his beloved soulmate! In fact, if you ever find yourself in a Hometown Buffet and the lines are way too long, just hold up that picture above. Every trick in the place will clutch their chest and run off to the hospital, thinking that the warmness in their heart area is a heart attack brought on by their fourth serving of orange chicken. But no, they won’t be having a heart attack. The warmness in their chest would just be a natural reaction to that heartwarming picture of Sisu and his unicorn friend!

Sisu is the stray dog in North Carolina who kept breaking into a Dollar General to steal a unicorn plush toy. And Sisu’s story stole the heart of the internet and now he and his unicorn soulmate are March’s Hot Sluts of the Month! Sisu and his unicorn soulmate (which sounds like the title of my favorite Game of Thrones spin-off that never was) got 75% of your votes. In second place is Sampson with 15% of the votes, followed by Mentadent (6% of the votes) and Humphrey Yogart (4% of the votes).

Sisu and his unicorn soulmate will compete in the Hot Slut of the Year semi-finals next year.

In the meantime, Sisu and his unicorn plushie are living in their forever home with their new humans who are probably suffering from cuteness overload from the constant sight of these two cuddling. Well, one way to combat cuteness overload is just to watch 2 minutes of the national news and your soul will be dark and numb yet again.

Thanks to all who voted!

Pic: Duplin County Animal Service