Low maintenance icon, Gwyneth Paltrow is back with yet another beauty routine video for Vogue. This time she’s doing a “less is more” beauty routine, and all the products she uses total up to $900. I mean, if you can afford the golden dildos and blanket saunas, you can spend a thousand dollars on face stuff, I guess. Besides, $900 is like 9 cents to Gwyneth, so she’s truly suffering for the peasants by infecting her pristine rich lady skin with all those disgustingly cheap products!
Gwyneth talked about her “guide to everyday skincare and wellness” and obviously used words like “clean” and “nontoxic.” Gwyneth started with a nut milk (ha “nut milk“) and almond butter smoothie and then rubbed a coarse brush on her body for “circulation and exfoliation among other benefits.” via Page Six:
After sipping a smoothie made with nut milk and almond butter, the 48-year-old Goop founder does a bit of dry body brushing to exfoliate and boost circulation, using her brand’s wood-handled brush ($20). As a “massive exfoliating junkie,” she follows that up with Goopglow Microderm Instant Glow Exfoliator ($125) to slough off more dead skin cells.
Next, Paltrow dabs on a few drops of Vintner’s Daughter Active Botanical Serum ($185), followed by Jillian Dempsey Hydrating Eye Masks ($75) if it’s a “special occasion.”
And of course, she humps her face with vibrating gold:
The lifestyle guru also loves Jillian Dempsey’s Gold Sculpting Bar ($195), which is made from 24-karat gold and vibrates (“Don’t get any ideas,” Paltrow quipped) to help tone, lift and revive tired skin.
Other products in Paltrow’s a.m. arsenal include cult favorite Weleda Skin Food ($19), Goopglow Glow Lotion ($58), Unsun Mineral Tinted Sunscreen ($29) and Goopgenes Clean Nourishing Lip Balm ($20).
But while the Oscar winner is all about skincare, she’s pretty minimal when it comes to cosmetics, reaching for just a few go-tos: Westman Atelier Vital Skin Foundation Stick ($68), Olio E Osso Lip & Cheek Tinted Balm ($28), Kosas The Big Clean Mascara ($26) and Ilia Balmy Gloss Tinted Lip Oil ($26).
I counted three lip balms. How friggin’ dry are Gwyneth Paltrow’s lips?
Here’s her full routine, and I know that Gwyneth has pretty much quit acting, but she’s really giving the performance of her life here. Because she hides the heaves while putting cheap sunscreen on her face. That Gwyneth is still a skilled thespian!