I wish I could say that title was a pun, and that Michael B. Jordan went full Overboard fantasy for Valentine’s Day, complete with an 80s yacht, lots of money, a sexy carpenter’s tool belt, jokes involving working with hard wood, and the implication that someone is about to get wet. That didn’t happen, but water and lots of money were involved. Michael B. Jordan wooed his girlfriend Lori Harvey with a very expensive trip to the aquarium and a hotel room full of flowers. And we know about this special, intimate date between the two of them because she Instagrammed every single moment.
Michael and Lori have been dating for a couple of months, and if you’re a regular person, a couple of months can have you hemming and hawing over how much money you should spend on V-day. Like, is this a Red Lobster night or a frozen shrimp pulled from the deep freeze situation. Michael doesn’t have to make those tough decisions, because he’s rich, so of course, he can splash out. People magazine says that Lori gave everyone a peek, or rather she flung the door wide open and showed off what her boyfriend did for her on Valentine’s Day. They started with a private trip to an aquarium, which Michael rented out completely. There they ate dinner, catered by Nobu.
Finally, they retired to their fancy hotel room, where about 86 thousand roses and the thermodynamic output of SO MANY candles awaited them inside.
I know you’re supposed to give a credit card upon arrival, for incidentals. But I have to wonder how much was inevitably charged to cover the cost of replacing the carpet in that room. You can’t tell me that one of them didn’t drunkenly stumble into a 5-foot tall flower arrangement and spill stinky rose stem water all over the floor, or knock those floating candle hurricane vases down like a row of dominoes. People notes that dropping cash on flowers is Michael’s thing:
It’s not the first time Jordan has surprised Harvey with a romantic gesture. PEOPLE’s reigning Sexiest Man Alive made his love feel special on her birthday last month with 15 bouquets of white roses.
“Thank you baby,” Harvey wrote over a video that showed off the roses on her Instagram Story, adding a heart eyes emoji.
Also, that $12.99 turtle might seem like a cheap choice for a gift, considering he rented out a whole aquarium, but Michael’s nickname for Lori is “Turtle.”
While all this may seem romantic, it’s really only sweet for those involved. This was the menu for Michael and Lori’s Valentine’s Day dinner, courtesy of Nobu:
Eating tuna and fluke in front of live fish?! While Michael and Lori were celebrating Valentine’s Day, the fish swimming around them lived a scene out of Halloween.