Night Crumbs

Chelsea Handler said that she shot her shot at being the First Lady of New York by asking out Governor Andrew Cuomo and after he said yes, he made like a martini one second after its placed in front of Chelsea Handler. He disappeared and ghosted her. Well, honestly, Andrew probably figured that if he did go out on a date, as soon as he watched Chelsea’s blond ass down her fourth vodka tonic, he’d loudly bawl while thinking of his ex: the original blonde boozer. And honestly, Chelsea just can’t compete with the legendary Sandra Lee, but who can? – Just Jared

And here comes Omarosa to drop another DUH on us, only I think she’s wrong about this one. Now, if she said Melania Trump is ALWAYS “repulsed” by Trump instead of “sometimes,” I wouldn’t look at her with a suspicious side-eye – Celebitchy

More shit about Prince Andrew that’ll make the definition of delusion feel inferior by comparison – Lainey Gossip

Here’s the trailer for the David Bowie biopic that doesn’t have the rights to David Bowie’s music, so go ahead and file this next to “sex without busting a nut” and “eating broccoli without mayonnaise” (don’t act like I’m not right!) on the list of Shit That Shouldn’t Happen – Pajiba

Dove Cameron is serving “40-minute business meeting at 9 and gym training at 9:45″ – Popoholic

Nicole Scherzinger tried to do the WAP dance but it ended up as the BAK (broken ass knees) dance – Egotastic!

Get ready to watch Z-listers break their asses while trying to do fan kicks in a 100-pound cat angel costume, because The Masked Dancer is coming, and the good news is that Paula Abdul is getting a check – SOW

Luke Evans and his charbroiled muscly chest hams are single again – Towleroad

Pic: Wenn.com