Matthew McConaughey “Wrote” A “Memoir”

July 30, 2020 / Posted by:

First of all, Matthew McConaughey approaches the word “poem” like it’s a danged rattlesnake fixin’ to send him to his maker. But you better believe he snatched that daggum critter by the tail and made it his bitch while introducing his upcoming memoir, Greenlights. Matthew’s describes his book, which comes out in October, as a collection of “sights and seens, nices and means, successes and failures,” but also of “stories, people, places, prayers, prescribes, and a whole lot of bumper stickers.” Ladies and gents, McConaughey is ready to take his place as America’s preeminent cowboy po-it (and his boots know it too— they’re Longfellows).

Because he is a rich and famous man, Crown Publishing gave Matthew the greenlight to collect the scraps of his journals that he’s been keeping “ever since [he] learned to write,” and paste them together on construction paper with a glue stick which some poor editor then had to try to make sense of. According to Matthew, that’s “when life’s a poem.” He calls that, seemingly without a trace of irony, “the honey hole.” Winnie The Pooh, call your agent immediately. According to People.

The Oscar-winning actor, 50, announced on social media Wednesday that he is releasing his first memoir, Greenlights, inspired by personal writings he’s penned throughout his life.

“So, ever since I learned to write, I’ve been keeping a journal, writing down anything that turned me on, turned me off, made me laugh, made me cry, made me question, or kept me up at night,” McConaughey said in an Instagram video on Wednesday.

“Two years ago, I worked up the courage to take all of those journals off into solitary confinement just to see what the hell I had. And I returned with a book,” he added, showing off the physical copy of his upcoming book, which features a black-and-white portrait of the actor on the cover.

Here’s Matthew explaining how traffic signals work.

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Tune in July 29th

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I hate to criticize the artist at work here, but don’t the green lights eventually turn red? Maybe that’s only if you’re a female actor over the age of 40. Here’s what else Matthew had to say about this book that I wish he had the balls to call Alright, Alright, Alright.

“It’s called Greenlights because its a story about how I have, and we all can catch more of them in this life we’re living. We don’t like the red and yellow lights because they take up our time, right? But when we realize that they all eventually turn green, that’s when they reveal their rhyme. That’s when life’s a poem and we start getting what we want and what we need. I call that the honey hole, a little place called heaven on Earth.”

Wouldn’t want all that rejected Lincoln ad copy to go to waste. Matthew is absolutely going to make this a required textbook for his Po-itry of the Mind class at the University of Texas next semester.

Pic: Instagram

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