Night Crumbs

March 4, 2020 / Posted by: Michael K

Because CROCS is out to slowly destroy humanity by tainting our delicious processed trash foods, they have followed up their unholy union with KFC by joining godless forces with Peeps for Easter. CROCS is truly showing their Satanic ways by using the resurrection of Jesus to sell shoes that will make your feet look like the growth-covered hooves of a hell troll. Oh, Peeps, how can I ever eat you again?! (I still will, but I’ll hate-eat you.) – Delish

More proof that Jennifer Garner is forever Ben Affleck’s Captain Save-A-Ho – Lainey Gossip

In the never-ending turd pile of shitty news that hits us, there’s sometimes a sparkle of good news and this sparkle comes in the form of an update on Alex Trebek’s health – Pajiba

Princess Bea will become Contessa Bea (which kind of sounds like the name of a fourth-tier child rapper) when she gets married – Celebitchy

The chairs on The Voice are sick and tired of being whipped around and are finally fighting back! – HuffPo

That dark ass picture makes the new Batmobile look like the El Camino that my uncle has been “working on” in his garage for decades – Egotastic!

Carrie Underwood is serving “worst photo in an America’s Next Top Model challenge” – Popoholic

Supergirl (not Helen Slater, the other one) is having a baby – SOW

???? Saloooon styyyyle! ???? SALON SELECTIVES! ???? Salooon glooooow! ???? SALON SELECTIVES! ???? – Just Jared

And finally, here’s Celine Dion proving with one look that she’s the greatest TV singing competition judge that never was:

Got to sing to @celinedion today and she was gracious enough to listen until the very end. She was so incredibly kind & beautiful. I posted this on my Instagram musicbyfreida. I feel so blessed to have met such a genuinely beautiful icon like her. ✨Looking for the full video. pic.twitter.com/QQumatmN6Y

— Freida Solomon (@FreidaSolomon9) March 4, 2020

Pic: Crocs

Tags: Night Crumbs

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