Open Post: Hosted By Bootleg Robert Redford And A Freshly Bathed Leonardo DiCaprio 

June 27, 2018 / Posted by:

Sharon Tate’s sister just found a new favorite picture to wipe her post-shit ass with….

The Quentin Tarantino Manson Murders movie, that nobody but those involved want, is currently shooting in Los Angeles, and to give us a little sneak peek of the foolery that will be bestowed upon us when this shit comes out next year, Leonardo DiCatchAHo posted this picture on Instagram of himself and Brad Pitt as western actor Rick Dalton and Rick’s stunt double. Okay, but if Brad is going to be somebody’s stunt double, he looks like 50-something Robert Redford’s stunt double. Brad Pitt is trying to be Robert Redford so bad that he’s close to shitting out some Newman’s Own popcorn. Oh wait, that’s Paul Newman. I guess all hot white movie star dudes from the olden days look the same to me.

Leonardo on the other hand… It’s amazing what a Silkwood shower, a Hazmat spray down, an industrial-strength comb, the best Petco groomers in the country, man Spanx, and a beard machete can do. Leo is looking good, and I’m sure nobody is happier than his young piece of the moment, because she was probably sick of getting flea bites on her lips every time she went down on him.

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood also stars Margot Robbie (as Sharon Tate), Dakota Fanning (as Squeaky Fromme), Al Pacino, James Marsden, Kurt Russell, Damian Lewis (as Steve McQueen), Timothy Olyphant, Burt Reynolds, Michael Madsen, Zoe Bell, Tim Roth, Emile Hirsch, and Luke Perry.

You know, there is a reason why this movie exists. It exists to give Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio the opportunity to apologize to Luke Perry for having the careers he should have! Justice 4 Luke Perry!

Pic: Instagram


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