Morgan Freeman Continues To Try And Turn Back The Time’s Up Clock

May 27, 2018 / Posted by:

One of the harsher realities for those of us bedazzled by fame (*raises hand weakly*) in the #MeToo era was the revelation this week that Morgan Freeman might be a handsy freak with balls big enough to sleaze on, among others, a CNN reporter despite her accompanying cameraperson (although, the proof she showed seems to be a reach…). The most comforting, penguin-narrating, God voice in Hollywood can’t be a trashbag, right? Oh yeah, he allegedly can. (The alleged relationship with his now deceased step-granddaughter might have been a clue.)

Morgan issued the now sadly requisite “didn’t do it but sorry if you thought I did” apology to his accusers on Friday, and Variety is reports that he’s rinsing and repeating.

In his new statement, Morgan notes that it’s a shame that his attempts to make people “feel appreciated” and set them “at ease” have been misconstrued as lechery. I don’t know about you, but nothing sets me more at ease than a man lifting up my skirt unsolicited to see if I’m wearing underwear. It’s like a day at a spa!

“I am devastated that 80 years of my life is at risk of being undermined, in the blink of an eye, by Thursday’s media reports.

All victims of assault and harassment deserve to be heard. And we need to listen to them. But it is not right to equate horrific incidents of sexual assault with misplaced compliments or humor.

I admit that I am someone who feels a need to try to make women—and men—feel appreciated and at ease around me. As a part of that, I would often try to joke with and compliment women, in what I thought was a light-hearted and humorous way.

Clearly I was not always coming across the way I intended. And that is why I apologized Thursday and will continue to apologize to anyone I might have upset, however unintentionally.

But I also want to be clear: I did not create unsafe work environments. I did not assault women. I did not offer employment or advancement in exchange for sex. Any suggestion that I did so is completely false.”

–Morgan Freeman

Vulture reports that Morgan is already losing endorsement deals. Vancouver, B.C.’s metro transit authority was all set to have Morgan be the voice of God giving instructions and making announcements on all of their buses and trains as part of a Visa ad campaign. That’s been canceled. That’s a shame because pre-“Morgan’s a creep,” nothing would make you feel more soothed on a bus than his earnest, comforting voice telling you to put out that cigarette and report suspicious packages.


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