Kaley Cuoco Thinks The House She Bought From Khloe Kardashian Is Cursed

DUH! Of course the house is cursed! You don’t have to be Father Karras to know that anything touched by, breathed on, owned by, looked at, sat on, or birthed out of a Kardashian had been marked by Satan. He and Kris Jenner are like a recently-engaged couple enthusiastically scanning shit at Bed Bath & Beyond for their bridal registry. Kaley Glencoco should have known better than to buy anything that used to belong to a Kardashian; the term “damaged goods” exists for a reason.

Back in January, Kaley Cuoco dropped nearly $6 million in Big Bang Theory dollars (they’re like regular dollars, but they come with the shame of knowing how you earned them) on the home Khloe Kardashian’s marriage to Lamar Odom died in. Now 3 months later, InTouch is saying that a source claims Kaley and her husband Ryan Sweeting have taken a proactive approach to cleansing their home of all the bad divorce juju that it came with:

“Kaley and Ryan hired a feng shui expert to restore the positive energy. Kaley doesn’t want their future affected by anything left behind.”

If that doesn’t work (it won’t, because = bullshit), they could always try burning sage or investing in healing stones. But don’t bother with oculomancy, because I’ve heard it’s totally bogus.

And unless one of the things left behind was a crack pipe that Ryan picks up and stuffs with crack, there’s nothing from Khloe and Lamar’s busted marriage that will cause Kaley and Ryans to do the same. Besides, cursed home or not, their relationship got the kiss of death the second Kaley got the date of her wedding tattooed on her back.