The Blunt Krasinski Baby Is Here

February 16, 2014 / Posted by:

You know, I think I bought two Blunt Krasinskis at the weed shop a few weeks ago.

Emily Blunt, the chick that I always look at and say, “You fucked Michael Buble once,” and John Krasinski¬†are new brand parents. Emily birthed out their first kid, a girl, today. Julia Roberts might be feeling extra smug and is basking in the glory of the impact of her baby name choices, because Emily and John named their kid Hazel. Maybe they’re just really big Shirley Booth fans. John Twatted about their kid today:

HAZEL! I guess the whole “giving your kid a name that sounds like the name of a country mouse in a Beatrix Potter book” trend is never going to end. Slap me with a wet hand if you have to, but I kind of like the name Hazel paired with their last names. Hazel Blunt Krasinski sounds like the name a Polish mobster’s elderly NOT THE ONE mom who lets her son use her meat market as a front for his money laundering operation. Hazel Blunt Krasinski is always wearing baggy hose and she hasn’t smiled since the 1960s. But I hope she just goes by Hazel Blunt, because I’ve definitely bought at least two Hazel Blunts from my weed shop and Hazel Blunt sounds like the name of a white British lady rapper. They should call her Haze Blunt for short. I totally got high just from typing that name.

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