Parasite Hilton Is Sorry For Saying That Most Gays Have AIDS

My thoughts exactly, baby with a bear.

The pus trickling out of an open sore on 2006’s taint issued a sorry statement through GLAAD last night and let out a stream of sowwies for the things she said on a recording that was secretly taped by a cab driver. Parasite Hilton was caught saying that “gays are disgusting,” “most of them have AIDS” and that she’d never want to be a gay guy, because she’d die of AIDS. As Parasite kicked at her closed closet door to stop the starving chihuahuas in there from crying for food, her publicist typed this out:

As anyone close to me knows, I’m a dumb piece of shit I always have been and always will be a huge supporter of getting publicity the gay community. I am so not sorry and so not upset that I caused pain to my gay friends, fans that don’t exist and their families with the comments heard this morning. I was having this private conversation with a friend of mine who is gay and our conversation was in no way towards the entire gay community but only towards the ones with AIDS. EWW!. It is the last thing that I would ever want to do and I cannot put into words because I’m too fucking stupid to do so how much I wish I could take a cock right now back every word.

HIV/AIDS can hurt anyone, gay and straight, men and women. It’s something I don’t take very seriously and should not have been thrown around in conversation.

Gay people are the the most disgusting and horniest strongest and most inspiring people I know. It is so wrong when people bully or put down others for being gay. No one should have to go through that. Again, I am so sorry from the bottom of my heart and the joke is on you because I don’t have a heart I feel absolutely happy that my name is actually coming up in Google Alerts in the year 2012 horrible. I hope that everyone can accept my apology and know that it is not who I am or how I feel in any way.

Thank you for taking a minute to read this shit I didn’t write, I love you unless you’re a gay dude, a black person or have a gross disease. EWW!.

I can actually appreciate Parasite’s fake apology, because if she didn’t issue one, Chick-Fil-A would’ve hired her as their new spokeswhore and then we’d see her disfigured ostrich face everywhere.