Cristiano Ronaldo Did Not Name His Baby Ronaldo

July 8, 2010 / Posted by:

You’re going to have to throw away the brow tweezers you got engraved with the name “Ronaldo” on it, because apparently that’s not what Cristiano Ronaldo named his 1-month-old son. Cristiano’s sister tells The Daily Telegraph that Crispy has given his son the name Cristiano Jr. I guess Cristianojesty was already taken. Crispy’s sister said:

“The baby is doing very well. We are looking after him while Cristiano is away. He’s called Cristiano just like his dad. “Cristiano chose the name but we like it. He looks like his father and like me. He has the same eyes. We don’t know the mother, we never met her.”

It makes sense that Cristiano Jr. is named Cristiano Jr. I mean, Crispy Sr. has already hired Mimi’s airbrusher to paint 6-pack abs on Crispy Jr. so his son can have a situation just like him! Crispy Sr. has already ordered a custom-made spray tanning playpen so that his son have a perfect “5-month-old orange left in the back of the fridge” complexion just like him! And Crispy Sr. has already already bought a pacifier that squirts lip gloss so that his son can have precious shiny lips just like him. So of course he’s going to name his son after himself!

Here’s more of Crispy Sr. flaunting his ebony toe nails while on vacation in NYC with his girlfriend. Before you start going on about how Crispy Sr. should be at home in Portugal with his new baby, think for a minute. Crispy Jr. is obviously not ready yet.. Do you really expect Crispy Sr. to spend an extended amount of time with a pasty baby with non-plucked brows?!

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