Peen On The Roof

Kids these days. They spend a few hours watching TV and it starts to give them ideas. Ideas which lead them to the roof of their parents’ house with a can of white paint in hand and a big dick on their mind. That’s how it went for 18-year-old Rory McInnes of England.

After watching a documentary on Google Earth, Rory was inspired to spend 30-minutes painting a true-to-size homage to Prince Hot Ginge’s peen (I wish) on the roof of his parents $2 million house. Rory based the mega peen on the Cerne Abbas Giant. Rory never told anyone about the peen on the roof, in fact it took his parents a full year to find out.

A helicopter pilot spotted the giant wang, took pictures of it and contacted The Sun. The Sun in turn contacted Rory’s dad and let him know that he’s been living with a juicy cock over his head for the past 12-months. Bitches were getting teabagged and didn’t even know it!

Rory’s dad immediately called his son, who was traveling in Brazil, to yell at his ass. Rory cocked, I mean, copped to it and just shrugged it off. Rory agreed to wash off his masterpeen when he gets back.

You know, Rory gets a taint lick for effort, but he could’ve spent more time on the nutsack. It’s a huge, thick cock with tiny shriveled up prunes. Not right. If you’re going to do it, do it right. Put some low hangers on that dong.

It’s also a good thing that Parasite Hilton never flew over that house within the past 12-months. That skank would’ve thrown herself from the plane and landed on that dick. They would’ve had to rent a crane to pry her pussy lips off of it!