Dear Ali, They Aren’t Here For You

January 16, 2009 / Posted by: Michael K

Oh, Aliana…Aliana…Aliana…. There’s no need to pretend like you’re not a famewhore who can’t wait to post these pictures on their Facebook to show your friends that the paparazzi follow you around all day. I’m sure you’ll tag them “Y wont they leavez me alooonez?!” You’re a Lohan, attention whoring runs deep in your coke stream. But thank you for not wearing a choker. You’ve finally stepped out of 1991.

HoHan spent a little quality time with her sister Ali yesterday in Malibu. They went to some grocery store and shopped for vitamins! Fun! HoHan was probably being the generous older sister that she is by telling Ali which vitamins are best for extending her Ecstasy roll. The answer is C!

And don’t you dare make fun of Ali’s oldface. White Oprah will chop you down and sniff you up if you do. Ali can’t help it! She suffers from that BENJAMIN BUTTON’S SHIT!

Tags: Dumbasses, Uncomfortable

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