Attack Of The Clones

On the left is the Crystal Enchantress of the Ice Johnny Weir signing copies of his memoirs at Macy’s in Philadelphia the other day. On the right is the forever reigning pretty pretty prince of the Internet Peter Pan Dude.

Both are what a fluffy white chicken would look like if it tried to escape the farm by disguising itself as Dorothy Hamill. Both could actually convince a room of strangers that Stuart from MADtv was based on them. Both could bedazzle a sheet of toilet paper by wiping their derrieres on it. Both piss hummingbird juice and huckleberry nectar. Both could give a sparkler show just by burping. And both have a nickname for their peen that could double as the name of a Popple.

Johnny is not one to Xerox copy a ho’s entire look, so I will assume he’s paying homage to the one and only Peter Pan Dude. I mean, who doesn’t open their closet in the morning and tell themselves that they want to look like Moe Howard meets Peter Pan Dude meets a Palm Springs divorcee?