Man Down, Code 10, The Scientologists Got Another One!

“Subtlety” got a new visual definition at last night’s NYC premiere of The Girl on the Train when Laura Prepon accidentally gave every camera there a full view of her engagement ring while casually and spontaneously draping her hand over her piece’s arm. That “Oh, holding my purse like this is really, really comfortable and natural for me and OH MY GOD why are you taking pictures of the engagement ring I’m wearing since I’m engaged, stop, stop asking me questions about my engagement ring” pose is so subtle. Because the purse she’s carrying is black, it looks like she’s putting her hands in an invisible manicure bowl and speaking of needing a manicure….

But nail polish-shaming aside, I totally forgot that Laura Prepon was bumping her Scientolocoochie against Ben Foster full-time. Last July, 36-year-old Laura and 35-year-old Ben were “spotted” acting all couple-like in NYC and New Jersey. And at last night’s TGOTT premiere, they made it perfectly clear that they’re planning to bump genitals as husband and wife. People also confirmed that the ring isn’t a STUNT QUEEN prop and they’re really engaged. Laura and Ben have only been a thing for a few months, but apparently they’ve known each other for years since he’s a good friend of her That ’70s Show co-star Danny Masterson. Laura was with Danny’s brother Christopher Masterson for a while and Ben was twice engaged to Robin Wright.

Yes, Laura Prepon is a Scientologist and most of us try to avoid having to witness Little Lord David Miscavige licking the Thetans on Tom Cruise’s b-hole during “church,” but I can see what Ben Foster sees in her. I mean, Laura’s eyebrows look like they were tattooed on by Bob Ross himself, and next to Xenu, she has the greatest set of eye valances in the world of Scientology. An amazing eyebrow situation will make a bitch do crazy things, like propose. (Besides, there’s speculation that Ben Foster is a closeted Scientologist.)

And Ben Foster looks absolutely thrilled about getting engaged (see: the picture above of him looking absolutely thrilled). Beefy Ben is either struggling to breathe since he’s stuffed into that suit, or he just realized that he signed up for a lifetime of playing a stupid reindeer next to annoying Jenna Elfman in Scientology’s annual Christmas Stories Pageant.

Pics: Wenn.com