Open Post: Hosted By A Falling Demi Lovato

July 6, 2015 / Posted by:

I know this is crazy thinking, but when you wear 12-foot-tall stilt shoes on a slippery surface that’s covered in water, there’s a good chance you’re going to need your friends to peel your face off of the ground after your stupid ass falls. While promoting her new song “Cool For The Summer” at one of her pool parties in L.A., my current favorite fashion icon Demi Lovato learned the hard way that the answer to the equation “heels + a wet surface” is: eating shit. A thousand “falling like her single on the iTunes charts” jokes were born when Demi went BOOM.

Demi, you dumbass. It’s still summer. It’s not fall time yet! (Yeah, the GONG is where it usually is. I polished it for you.) But really, apparently “Demi Lovato falling” is a thing that happens often. Trick was falling for attention long before Jennifer Lawrence was doing. She’s the eating floor queen and I’m sure Scarlet will tell you that Demi is her falling inspiration. There’s compilation videos of Demi’s falls. I bet Demi’s on-and-off-and-on-and-off-again douche of a boyfriend Wilmer Valderrama shows those compilation videos to his friends and says, “You know why she has trouble standing, brah,” while pointing at the bulge I’ve stared at for way too long.

And here’s Demi at one of her pool parties in Miami solidifying herself as a fashion leader by dressing like a Florida NASCAR parking lot hooker.

Pics: KDNPIX, Getty

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