About Dr. Oz's Peen Print.....
My mom is one of the most caring and sensitive people I know. Scratch that. Let me do that sentence again. My mom is the ONLY caring and sensitive person I know since everybody else I know is a straight-up bitch. There that's better. Even though my mom is a kind soul, she's never really fazed by the dumb-coated pieces of mangled trash that my mouth shits up on a regular basis. But one of the only times I saw her get sad on the inside over some crap I spewed up was when we were watching her personal God, Dr. Oz, on TV and I said that he looked like a functioning corpse. The look on her face jumped between "you just strangled my kitten with my favorite cardigan while pissing with the seat down in my guest bathroom" to "you better learn how to drop your neck into your body real quick because I'm about to choke you out."
She is serious about her Dr. Oz and I'm sure one of her dreams in life is to be his assistant of the day so she can gaze up at his apple chip face as he tells her to crawl through a Colossal Colon or some weird shit like that. That is why I cannot and refuse to analyze the possible appearance of Dr. Oz's crotch wizard in the pages of Good Housekeeping. Damn TMZ, damn Good Housekeeping and damn me for posting this:
If you show this to my mom, do not tell me about it. Because the next time I'm watching Dr. Oz with her, I do not want to know why her smile is extra smiley. No. All parties involved are wrong for this. I hate cameras, I hate paper, I hate magazines, I hate scanners, I hate upload buttons and I hate the Internet.
• 
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OMG, he's my mother's personal godhead too! Why do old Latina women love him so much? She's always quoting him as if everything he says will cause miracles and the seas to part and crap like that.
I doubt that she'd enjoy seeing his junk, however - she just doesn't think of him that way. Her love is pure and worshipful. And what kind of G-D name is Oz, anyway?
Moose Knuckle
Dude went to Harvard undergrad and Penn for his MD/MBA. Dude's allowed to show off his big peen.
But he's still gay.
* * * * * * * * * * *
Please: It's "rahnday."
YOU'RE ON FIRE, MICHAEL! HUGE LOLS!
OMG! Don't forget Nate Berkus!! AAargh! Accidentally watched a smidge of his "show"...*&^%ing awful!
The pic says it all- Dr. Oz is a dick. I can't stand this fool. He's just another irritant that Oprah unleashed on the world along with Dr. Phil and Rachael Ray.
"Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 11:55am.
Only the women that read Good Housekeeping while mixing Oreos in their Activia would focus on the outline of Dr. Oz's dick in a pasta ad....
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*put down Oreos*
I'm sorry...what...
*Stares*
The women in the audience on his show are so embarrassing. I mean, whatever floats your boats, ladies, but could you stop leaving drool puddles on the floor?
I have no idea who this guy is (I don't watch TV but once a month - too busy).
What's the deal? I don't see anything impressive in the crotch region. *shrugs* Is he suppose to be hot or something?
Thank god someone else thinks what I have thought for years about this guy. He seems nice enough and all but yes,... A functioning copse describes it well. He always had that look that certain vegetarians I knew had. That for all their 'healthy' eating they were seriously missing something their body needed.
Thank god someone else thinks what I have thought for years about this guy. He seems nice enough and all but yes,... A functioning copse describes it well. He always had that look that certain vegetarians I knew had. That for all their 'healthy' eating they were seriously missing something their body needed.
I'm truly sorry I looked at that.
women's "top" goods are on display through skintight blouses all the time, why the f is it such a big deal when a guys goods are on display? it shouldn't be, we need to see more of this stuff
The Oz Schloz.
I bet a million bucks he has a pencil dick. I dated a jockey for a while (I'm so short I can play handball on the curb) and he had a long skinny one and reminds me exactly of Dr. Obviously Dresses Left.
Gross. Can't figure out if he's got something in his pocket or it's peen. Either way, he needs a new taylor.
Dr. O My!! obviously dresses left as they say in the tailoring trade!!
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 2:09pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 2:01pm.
I even doubled up on the post Ms Fury!
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Love makes that happen. Proper fake internet love.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0qTOkUPlGk&feature=related
Has anyone mentioned that this "peen" print actually kind of looks like a giant, wide, camel-toe?!
D-Listed Theme Song of the Day:
Detachable Penis by King Missle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byDiILrNbM4
Lots of valuable information in the comments this thread. Still on the fence about the dominant hand.
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
Is there such thing as "international penis day"? If not, today certainly feels like it on DListed!
Wasn't there a penis-fest in Japan back in March...
(I can't google this - I'm at work)
Maybe the pasta is just REALLY good.
I know a lot of people find him super hot, but I just can't see it. He's old, his hair's too perfectly sculpted, and he smiles like a child molester at a playground.
Zomay...hahaha! *so proud*
Maybe he has a dildo in his pocket.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 2:01pm.
I even doubled up on the post Ms Fury!
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Love makes that happen. Proper fake internet love.
________________________________
Dark-sided!
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 2:00pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:02pm.
So how big is your thingy?
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LOL, let's just say bigger when you're around:P
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OMG! THAT IS SO RUDE!
DO GO ON!
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Dark-sided!
Love Dr. Oz! He does stand on his own. Even Dr. Phil does. Gotta love that!
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:02pm.
So how big is your thingy?
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LOL, let's just say bigger when you're around:P
I even doubled up on the post Ms Fury!
That's probably the same face he makes when he smells his own feces.
YOU HORS!!!
You put a mental paper bag over the face and just took the groin. Should of known.
;)
.................................
Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
Zomay - we've been discussing this far too long, him being Dr. Oz has evacuated the equation, it's stricktly about peen now.
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:44pm.
that must be his O face
(and I don't mean Oprah)
^^^LOLZ!!
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Douchechill!
DR. fucking OZ?? Good god whats next, Minnie Pearl shows us her nipples?! The guy is so un-sexy. Or maybe I am not getting the appeal.
.................................
Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
Mmmmmmmmmm hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Coma Caca!
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that must be his O face
(and I don't mean Oprah)
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Must. Never. Let. My. Mother. See. This.
Holy heck, that skinny belt looks like it CAME WITH his wife's ladies' pants she bought years ago! hehehee Who wears belts that tight?! Unless they want to accentuate the IMPRINT more?! lol sneaky bugger... ya right enjoying some pasta... *just look at my PEEN!* LOLOLOL ;p
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░
Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:29pm.
@M.E. lol HOR!! *sits with you*
Ugh I can't stop looking. Reminds me of this guy I worked with that everybody called Papa Smurf. Short old and with horrible teeth. Anyway, my boss pointed out to me that his print was halfway down his thigh. After that, I always glanced and he always smiled knowingly. I hated myself for that!! Stupid reflexes.
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Like a moth to a flame, as is the hand to a peen.
I may be thinking it 24/7 but the only peen I actually grab is the one I married, so THERE!
peen print brings all the moms to the yard...
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Sweetas the sinner of sin!!!! stop it!!
Imma have nightmares during nap times!
On topic : yeah...crotches. what a crotchy kind of day today is.
Coma Caca!
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Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:02pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:56pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:46pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:33pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:30pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:27pm.
So, he's right handed I see.
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I say that cause...well let's just say I'M left handed:P
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So it leans to the right eh?
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No to the left, I think you hang to whatever hand you pull on it with. Don't know for as I've never actually done a survey but I'ma lefty and Ima left hanger.....TMI!! Lol:)
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Um, way TMI for all the ladies here, thank you!
So how big is your thingy?
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Hahahahahahaha
I'm gonna die!!!!!!!!!!!! Wiping tears here!
ok yeah, he is Turkish American....
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
lol Chiri!!!! *chases you around with a peen print*
LOL at Sweetas!! yes he does look like papa smurf :S aaaaaack. deletes pc save as wallpaper of Dr Oz's crotch? don't judge me!!!
Coma Caca!
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@M.E. lol HOR!! *sits with you*
Ugh I can't stop looking. Reminds me of this guy I worked with that everybody called Papa Smurf. Short old and with horrible teeth. Anyway, my boss pointed out to me that his print was halfway down his thigh. After that, I always glanced and he always smiled knowingly. I hated myself for that!! Stupid reflexes.
Whether that's his cock or not - I'd hit it. He could stick the WHOLE thing in, not just the head.
But really, I'd want a three way with Dr. Oz and Sanjay Gupta. All that international cock….mmmm!
Submitted by Spaz de la Whoreta on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 1:12pm.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:54pm.
Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 05/16/2012 - 12:40pm.
Like 98.4% of that show is talking about poop. The remaining 1.4% is dedicated to things you didn't know can kill you, but definitely will and are probably killing you right now- and will make you immediately vomit.
☆☆☆☆
What about the other .2%????
Actual helpful advice.
(not really, I'm just super bad at math)