BREAKING: JLo Is Still Acting Like A Diva Bitch
The day that we hear that JLo is a pleasure to work with and makes all of her co-workers bust out a smile as they nominate her for EMPLOYEE OF THE CENTURY is a day that will never ever come. The chance of that happening is right up there with the world's fattest fatty fat fat bitch NOT accidentally suffocating her dog with her double down fupa cleavage of death.
Everyone knows that all spell checks should be updated to automatically correct the word "BITCH" to "JLO." We all know this. JLo can't sing and can't act, but one thing she can do is bring the bitchery in heavy doses. The cast and crew of her new shit show What To Expect When You're Expecting (aka Valentine's Day meets a pile of labor poop) are witnessing this for themselves every day says Gatecrasher:
Jennifer Lopez is keeping to herself these days - at least on movie sets. A source on the location yesterday of "What to Expect When You're Expecting," which stars the recently separated Lopez along with a slew of other A-listers, tells us the 42-year-old "wouldn't talk to anyone directly" on the Piedmont Park set in Atlanta, and would converse with people only "through her handler."
JLo knows that she has a reputation as a diva-plated asshole to uphold, so of course she's going to pull out some ridiculous shit like this. But what JLo doesn't know is that she's actually bestowing an act of kindness upon the damn crew. I mean, would you rather talk to JLo's handlers or would you rather pop an eye vein by trying to not roll your sight balls while talking to JLo herself? Exactly. Joke's on that bitch. Fishsticks Paltrow better almost run over more jaywalkers, because JLo is trying to snatch away GOOP's sainthood without even trying.
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Teri Hatcher is the same way. A co-worker's friend was at a banquet and he sat at a table with Hatcher. Hatcher refused to talk to anyone - rude. Teri's handler asked the friend if Teri could have his roll. Teri than had the handler say thank you. Teri Hatcher = Diva "JLo"
This is typical JHO Bag behavior. Once she gets into some cash, she spends it like crazy on handlers, assistants and other people she can scream at, and threaten to fire. Typical low class part time Latina trash. The only talent she has is her trick pelvis and no gag reflex.
She Stinks!
Thanks Louise! I know more but it's all small screen English stars so no one here would know them.
Jintesse - that sounds hilarious and I applaud you!
Submitted by boston61 on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 11:40pm.
Why do Latin women tend to be so bitchy? Does anyone know? I know not all. But there is something too this.
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Careful with that. I said once that Latin Women tended to have a temper and some people here lost their shit over it.
Why do Latin women tend to be so bitchy? Does anyone know? I know not all. But there is something too this.
Submitted by Possum on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 11:05pm.
I don't think she's wearing near enough makeup.
*giggling like AC, hand over face*
I don't think she's wearing near enough makeup.
Submitted by literarylioness on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 10:08pm.
I know this is going to sound wrong, but I think that's why JBlow married Skeletor. He was the only one who would put her in her place and she liked that. Like CEOs who get beat for pleasure
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ITA literarylioness! She liked the feeling of being controlled by someone who wouldn't take any of her crazy-ass shit--but after 5 minutes or so, it got old.
God knows Skeletor is a sociopath but this aging, needy, full-of-herself cunt is as big of a douche as he is.
I know this is going to sound wrong, but I think that's why JBlow married Skeletor. He was the only one who would put her in her place and she liked that. Like CEOs who get beat for pleasure.
Submitted by Datura on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 11:27am.
I've seen Rosemary's Baby ten times. I know EXACTLY what to expect if I'm ever expecting.
Classic!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ja5qOR-eyFo
Live and learn, or forget and remember.
Oh damn and "Don't forget the hot sauce, Chulo" just made me laugh until my belly hurts.
Taco Flavored Kisses!
Hekki, I need some tips from your mother. My boyfriend's parents are the worst, I would love to ban them but never could. HAHAHA!
Taco Taco
Did you know there were four taco songs? "OOoohh those tacos look so good, I'm just Jenny from da hood!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ja5qOR-eyFo
"Taco, Taco, Burritos!"
One of the very good South Park episodes for sure, Red Dwarf :)
And OMG, I cannot stop looking at this face, because it's indeed a trainwreck.
*sighs* She married Skeletor. Nothing more need be said about her cold zombie heart. Also, JLo, you're pushing 50. You might want to re-think cuntness if you want some fans/friends at this point. That is all.
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"You dumb bitch, I am home." -MK to Brooke's crybaby 'daddy-puts-the-lotion' ass
*paints mouth on hand with red lipstick*
"Taco keeses for my Bennn"
she looks like the filipino JLO tranny at San Diego Lipps
Submitted by Datura on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 11:27am.
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I've seen Rosemary's Baby ten times. I know EXACTLY what to expect if I'm ever expecting.
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OMG, haha!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:31pm.
Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:23pm.
God! Lainey! More like LAME-Y! She knows she is such a hack, she dare not have a comment section. She thinks because she has done a few "Red Carpet" interviews, she is in the league of those irritants on E! -
Celebitchy, if you DARE not worship at the altar of Jolie, or any of the people she (Kaiser) fancies. you get put on moderation then banned for YOUR OPINION. Uh, isn't that what a comments section is for? OPINIONS? Her writing is juvenile at best, worse than Lamey's, and he humor makes a junior high schooler's look mature.
Gawker with their "interview" process, where you have to be "invited" to post. BARF! Like JLo, they think very highly of themselves!
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Huh? Gawker has an interview process to post?
Wow.
Damn, these blogs get more and more political the more I venture outside D-listed.
Submitted by RedPeggy on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 4:40pm.
Condi - tell the George Clooney story! I have a few insights too but nothing that is relevant to this thread. In short here's the nuggets of gossip I can pass on.
Sharon Stone is a massive bitch who refused to have her luggage flown on the private jet it had been put on because the 'jet was too small'. She wasn't even travelling on that plane herself!
RPatz is straight and very nice.
Phil Collins is very nice.
Not very interesting or scandalous, I'm afraid.
They are interesting! I love Dlisted celeb encounters. I have heard a rumor that RPatz has a big girl fetish and that is one of the reasons no one sees him with women very often. I have no idea how true that is (probably not at all LOL).
I don't understand that pic. That doesn't even look like JLo. Can someone explain who that is? Mama Knowles maybe?
so how long ago did she get her nose job? Cause now I see it. You can see where they took cartilage off the top of the tip of her nose, because the cartilage on the sides is growing. This is why I am afraid to get a nose job. Because whatever cartilage is left will grow and sort of 'highlight' where you had the work done.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Someone said this before in an earlier post, but who the hell thought naming a movie after a week-by-week pregnancy guide was a good idea? what's next, "The 18-Week Colon Cleanse?"
Never mind the fact that JLo is in it. ugh.
Oh yeah and one more thing (ode to Columbo) I don't know what a 'teamster' is but I loved that story!
I have heard a thousand times about diva antics - and I have always maintained that I would never go along with that crap.
Clearing out bathrooms so the star could use them? I would flat out refuse. As long as I am not working with this person it is of no consequence to me who they are, plus I hate Beyonce and J-Lo and all those idiots. I'd refuse to go along with any of that crap - the emperor is NAKED people!
Oh yeah and one more thing (ode to Columbo) I don't know what a 'teamster' is but I loved that story!
I have heard a thousand times about diva antics - and I have always maintained that I would never go along with that crap.
Clearing out bathrooms so the star could use them? I would flat out refuse. As long as I am not working with this person it is of no consequence to me who they are, plus I hate Beyonce and J-Lo and all those idiots. I'd refuse to go along with any of that crap - the emperor is NAKED people!
Oh, and Lily Allen is a huge cow.
Condi - tell the George Clooney story! I have a few insights too but nothing that is relevant to this thread. In short here's the nuggets of gossip I can pass on.
Sharon Stone is a massive bitch who refused to have her luggage flown on the private jet it had been put on because the 'jet was too small'. She wasn't even travelling on that plane herself!
RPatz is straight and very nice.
Phil Collins is very nice.
Not very interesting or scandalous, I'm afraid.
Nice make-up, clown! Everyone who has a wide nose gets a lighter line of make-up down the middle and darker make-up on the side of the nose to give the illusion that the nose isn't as wide and round as it is. I love when the make-up artist doesn't even try to blend it, this fool looks just as stupid as Lil'Kim, Lala Vasquez and all the others who walk out of the house with a stripe down their nose thinking they can fool us.
I can't stand this ho.
Oh dear,
This poor girl has no real singing talent. Not like my dear Judy, who was the
best belter of them all, Or Barbra, who I made 'On A Clear Day' with. I sit in
my salon, and just want her to GO AWAY. My Liza is 10 times the talent that
J- HO is. I pity you all, who get these semi-talented whores, and have to think of them as stars. Ann Miller was a STAR.
Vinvente Minnelli
I hate this fucking talentless cow. She's had boat loads of surgery and can't keep a man. And the fact that she fancies herself relevant again because she's on american idol is laughable. Sure, you're relevant to fat housewives in middle america.
Submitted by hotpocket on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 2:37pm.
My handler writes all my Dlisted posts. It's been years since I saw that South Park episode, but everytime I see JLo, I think "I like tacos." Everytime. Bless you Trey and Matt and Cartman's hand.
Me too. It's one of my favorite episodes.
"When you eat a taco, it comes out your backside too, chulo!"
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 2:40pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:54pm.
Putas said she Googled something about Kaiser and she found some site that had a whole thread devoted to hating Celebitchy and Kaiser.
That was this thread. :)
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Hardy har! But it was actually last night.
Funny comment though!
In her defense her skin looks great and no-one looks good that close up!
She was on the cover of US last week and a huge section of the story is about how "real" she has been on set and how while others stay in their trailers, she is chatting to the crew all the time and they all think she's the schnizz.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:54pm.
Putas said she Googled something about Kaiser and she found some site that had a whole thread devoted to hating Celebitchy and Kaiser.
That was this thread. :)
My handler writes all my Dlisted posts. It's been years since I saw that South Park episode, but everytime I see JLo, I think "I like tacos." Everytime. Bless you Trey and Matt and Cartman's hand.
She had a nose job right? That thing is too small for her face.
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Proud supporter of the Donner Party
I take issue with the use of 'other' in that report. Jenny aint no A Lister, she jus be from da block.
Submitted by BorgQueen on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 1:46pm.
Mmmm I LOVE Alex O'Loughlin. So yummy.
Why are they making a movie about the book you read when you find out you're preggo. Realllllly running out of ideas, Hollywood.
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
send this hoodrat back to her porjects in the ghetto so she can open a Bodega...I'd be a cunt too if my kids looked like that
If you think she's bad, you MUST check out the flick:
FEED
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I saw that movie. I watched b/c of Alex O'Loughlin and OMFG that movie is crazy. Like "se7en" crazy.
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Live like the bombshell I really am!!! RIP AMY. Hope u find the peace that eluded you in life.
Submitted by Condi the ingro... :I have another story about her involving George Clooney, but that's for another day.
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No no no no no, don't you leave us with a tease like that. Spill it! :-D
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
Submitted by SpiceDong: I know someone who experienced JLO's bullshit first hand on a L'Oreal shoot.
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I SAW that commercial last night! In the version I saw she had 3 lines: "I'm smooth. I'm sleek. Ever."
I looked over at my sister and said "Bitch had 3 lines! I wonder how much she pulled in for that!"
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
"Ew! She looks like the Head Bitch of Cameroon here!"
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Thank you! I could not put my finger on who this bloated and feathered fupa looked like!
Re: Lainey
I like her smack downs of Fishy, but other than than that no mas.
If you think she's bad, you MUST check out the flick:
FEED
She was a decent actress in some movies ( love that anaconda snake movie, EEK ! ), but otherwise, she thinks she worth much more than she is...Diva greedy slut...
Submitted by Condi the ingro... on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:50pm.
It's a shame what happened to that talented girl.
It's even moreso who was chosen to portray her.
Selena could actually sing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUJHGC6PQ9w
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Yeah everyone was upset when they picked JLo for the Selena movie. There were some talented girls that actually looked like Selena and could sing and dance that had auditioned for the part, but Jho must have sucked some mean dick for that role.
Submitted by Condi the ingro... on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:50pm.
I'll trot out my JLo stories AGAIN: My sister used to live next door to a Teamster. One day he told her that he was charged with being Lopez's driver on a show (this is when she was first blowing up as a film star after Selena).
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It's a shame what happened to that talented girl.
It's even moreso who was chosen to portray her.
Selena could actually sing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUJHGC6PQ9w
Submitted by rotten_egg on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:51pm.
-Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:31pm."
You've nailed it with Lainey. I fucking hate that pretentious twat. I can't seem to be able to read more than a few lines of her crappy writing nowadays. I always leave her site with a big "huh?!" because she babbles too much and can't seen to get to the point, besides trying to sound cool with "swear words".
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I just can't with her. I won't go to that site unless MK links something and I get curious or bored.
She also thinks she is one hot property. BLECH!
Submitted by Jintess on Fri, 08/19/2011 - 12:47pm.
I am so going to sign up for celebitchy now.
Just because life isn't lived if you haven't helped someone's blood pressure hit the roof.
Plus he/she/it steals from this site.
TEAM EVIL_CUPCAKE
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Putas said she Googled something about Kaiser and she found some site that had a whole thread devoted to hating Celebitchy and Kaiser. I have to go look at yesterdays "Afternoon Crumbs " thread to see where it was, because I so want to read it!
Poor JLo, getting ignored in favor of bitching about Celebitchy! LOL!