Night Crumbs
You would think that the makers of AppleTV+’s ode to musicals show Schmigadoon! would trade in their favorite child’s kidney for a chance to get Broadway legend Patti LuPone in an episode, but she claims they rejected her ass for being “too old.” La LuPone says that she really wanted to be in Schmigadoon! but when her people contacted the show, she was told she’s too SCHMIGAOLD! She was sad and depressed about it because she really wanted to be in it. Hmmm… did something get lost in translation? Because this doesn’t make sense to me unless you tell me that Andrew Lloyd Webber is now the head casting director of Schmigadoon! – Just Jared
The look IS Ryan Gosling (who I thought was Lukas Gage for a second) serving early-aughts Florida salon owner thanks to his hair looking like it just got jumped by a gang of Sun-In bottles – Lainey Gossip
Liev Schreiber will be an actual daddy again since his girlfriend Taylor Neisen has got a womb full of their first child, and his third – Hollywood Life
Al Pacino is once again talking about how we could’ve watched Han Solo deliver the line, “Say hello to my little friend,” before whipping out his lightsaber in a Star Wars movie. Pacino has talked about turning down the role of Han Solo in the past, and he got into it again recently. And yes, Al Pacino is still waiting for a thank you basket from Harrison Ford for giving him “a career” – Variety
“Hi, yes, 911, I’d like to report a murder in progress. I just read that Hollywood is planning to destroy and mutilate 80s masterpiece Girls Just Want to Have Fun!” – SOW
Like most Americans during the COVID lockdown, Jake Gyllenhaal discovered that you can actually make sourdough bread your fucking self, and he did! Jake’s godmother Jamie Lee Curtis says that he lived with her during quarantine and made a lot of sourdough bread. Since Jake’s sourdough adventures started when he lived with Jamie Lee Curtis, I can’t wait for them to drop their collab recipe for shit-inducing Activia bread. (Yes, JLC is Jake’s godmother, and Paul Newman was his godfather) – Celebitchy
One week ago, Drake Bell was declared “missing and endangered” by police. He’s not missing anymore, which makes it easier for him to be served with divorce papers that were just filed by his wife, Janet Von Schmeling – People
Pic: INSTARImages