Hot Sluts Of The Day!

January 17, 2023 / Posted by:

Bernice Fitzgerald and Joy Cullison, the Hoveround Queens of the Grand Canyon!

Before you ask, “Is this a posthumous HSOTD?” the answer is: NO! Because Bernice Fitzgerald and Joy Cullison are ageless wonders who, I’m sure, are still ruling the Grand Canyon on their mobile thrones. But in the 90s, Bernice and Joy were icons of daytime television for me, and a “sick day” from school was not complete without an appearance from these two majestic world-traveling memaws in between episodes of All My Children and One Life to Live.

Hoveround is a Florida-based company that was created by the perfectly-named Tom Kruse, an inventor and former nurse. Hoveround makes mobility scooters for people who need help getting around. In the 90s, I did not need help with getting around, but one of the images that regularly filled the dream bubble hovering over my head was of me zooming down the aisles of a supermarket in a Hoveround. Or taking on the Grand Canyon like Queen Bernice and Queen Joy! In the commercial that seemed to play on TV for eons, a narrator tells Bernice and Joy to let everyone know which power wheelchair got them to the Grand Canyon. And as a helicopter circled around them, Bernice and Joy let out a Hoveround battle cry! The commercial makes it seem as though Bernice and Joy drove their Hoveround hundreds of miles through the desert and rough terrain to get to the Grand Canyon when they probably just rolled on over from the parking lot. But still, all hail these Grand Canyon legends!

And that Hoveround commercial is probably the real reason why there was never a sequel to Thelma & Louise (1991). That Hoveround commercial is the only one we need. Because obviously, Thelma and Louise (31-YEAR-OLD SPOILER ALERT!) survived that crash into the Grand Canyon, changed their identities to Bernice Fitzgerald and Joy Cullison, and lived a long, full life before returning to the Grand Canyon in their bad bitch mobiles!

Pic: YouTube

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