Hot Slut Of The Day!

January 10, 2023 / Posted by:

Pringles Stix!

Okay, I already knew that my brain was a shit-covered mound of broken memory chips, but I really did think that Pringles Stix came from the 1990s. My busted memory failed me again because Pringles Stix made its debut in the aughts. Specifically, the late aughts (the laughts?). Pringles Stix were long skinny Pringles that were perfect for those with small, tight mouths who couldn’t widen their eatin’ holes enough to fit in a regular Pringle.

At the beginning of 2008, Pringles started serving up Julius Pringles’ (yes, that’s Mr. P’s full government name) long, hard cheesy stick, which also came in flavors like honey butter, pizza, vanilla, and crunchy wheat. While Pringles are made up of potato flakes and cornstarch, Pringles Stix was made of wheat for some reason. In this commercial for Pringles Stix, Julius Pringles becomes a real skinny legend (sorry, Trixie Mattel) and disco dances with a lady Pringles Stix figure.

Julius Pringles’ flavorful stick didn’t make it far past the 2010s before it got shit-canned. But like most discontinued things in the world, there’s a devoted group of fans who are demanding the return of Pringles Stix. In this cry for Pringles Stix’s return on Change.org, one Stixhead lays down the case for why it should return. However, they’re wrong about Stix being “potato sticks. ” But in their defense, they’re obviously blinded by love and can’t deal with pesky facts!

The taste was great because it had flavors for both people who like spicy and people who like sweet while having it be a unique and tasty flavor. The cheese and pizza flavors were good for spicy lovers and the honey butter and sugar cookie flavors were good for sweet lovers. And what made them unique was how all flavors were salty, giving the pizza and cheese flavors a good amount of kick of spice and the honey butter and sugar cookie flavors a perfect combination of salty and sweet.

The convenience was great also because they were crispy potato sticks, but with different flavors that weren’t just potatoes, so they were easy to eat, and came in small packs that you can even eat from the pockets of your pants; they actually remind of me of snack foods from Japan, and we all know how they’re so good

I never had a Pringles Stix, and that’s a good thing for my friends. Because they probably would’ve broken their eye-rolling muscles by seeing me grab a Stix and say, “Watch me deepthroat Julius Pringles’ pencil dick!”

Pic: Kellogg’s

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