Night Crumbs
While some people side-eye 20-year-old Billie Eilish’s thing with 31-year-old Jesse Rutherford, she’s constantly pinching herself because she can’t believe she bagged such a scalding piece of pure hotness. During her annual interview with Vanity Fair, Billie says that deserves a round of applause for pulling the hottest “fucking fucker alive.” Yup, spoken like a true 20-year-old. And well, if you ever want to see the visual definition of FUCKINGCRINGE just wait a few years until Billie talks to Vanity Fair again, and they decide to majorly embarrass her by bringing up that quote of cringe – Yahoo!
Queen Camilla is really modernizing her role (served on a lukewarm bed of sarcasm) by changing the name of her “ladies in waiting” to her “Queen’s companions.” Camilla’s “companions” will also take on a less formal position than before. Never mind that “Queen’s companion” sound like something my auntie would call the boyfriend I brought to a family gathering (“Oh, that guy with Michael, he’s that queen’s companion!“), the royals should’ve kept it real and changed the “ladies in waiting” title to “ladies who get their expenses paid to pretend like they can stand Camilla” – Lainey Gossip
We can thank Robert Pattinson for bringing us the meaning of “everlasting love” by introducing Taika Waititi to his now alleged-wife Rita Ora. Taika says that he met Rita through Robert Pattinson. Yeah, Robert Pattinson. That’s a funny way to say, “Rita’s extremely hard-working PR team” – OMG Blog
Speaking of non-stop PR-ing, Jennifer Lopez is still pushing Ben Affleck as the real love of her life™ and says she felt like she wasn’t going to survive their first breakup – Just Jared
Today in Rich Eating The Rich: Howard Stern drags Oprah for “showing off” her “estates,” “gardens,” and “servants” on Instagram – Celebitchy
The makers of that Winnie the Pooh horror movie are now making a horror movie starring a vicious Bambi who kills everyone! Honestly, this Bambi horror movie sounds like a Bambi documentary. Because it makes so much sense that Bambi would become a vengeful killing machine after humans murdered his mom – SOW
Mariah Carey must’ve seen Jennifer Hudson get that EGOT for being a producer of Broadway’s Strange Loop (which won the Tony for Best Musical) and thought, “I can do that too, daaaahling.” Because Mimi has joined the producing team of Broadway’s Some Like It Hot musical right before it opens – Jezebel
The Rock denies he’s running for POTUS anytime soon, but I don’t know if I believe him anymore. Because he recently paid a visit to a 7-Eleven he regularly stole Snickers from as a broke teenager and bought every Snickers in the place as a way to clear his conscience. The Rock left the giant bag of Snickers at the counter for customers to take. I see you, The Rock. I see you trying to clean up your dirty laundry before the other side gets to it! – HuffPo
Pic: Axelle Woussen/BauerGriffin/INST/Cover Images