Hot Slut Of The Day!

April 7, 2020 / Posted by:

Leslie Jordan, the star of this pandemic’s must-see quarantine show The Leslie Jordan And ONLY Leslie Jordan Show!

Leslie Jordan has always been four feet and eleven inches of high-octane showmanship, pure grade charm, and organic hilariousness (see: Ski Patrol, Will & Grace, Sordid Lives, Hearts Afire, etc… etc…), but many are just learning about his brilliance. Many people have been forced to live their lives like me (never leave the house, social distance themselves from all of humanity, become allergic to outside air, and have riveting conversations with plants), and Leslie Jordan is one of those who is dealing with a case of the BORES. But he’s been gracious enough to share his tales of hermit living on Instagram, and has become a rare sparkle in this ingrown ass wart hair of a situation. Shit, I have watched every one of Leslie’s videos, and I usually don’t watch that much solo pepaw action unless it’s on PornHub.

Leslie has been on lockdown in his homeland of Chattanooga, Tennessee for a couple of weeks, and while there, he regularly lets us in on what kind of thoughts come out of his mind from boredom squeezing it hard. Like this:

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This is TORTURE. #boredshitless

A post shared by Leslie Jordan (@thelesliejordan) on

But Leslie doesn’t only do an impersonation of your dog suffering through the torture of you being home all the time, he also takes us into his yard to meet his hardscrabble pussy:

And his mouth releases poetic jewels like “if I had to haul ass, it’d take two trips” while talking about doing his exercise ruh-jeem.

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My Exercise Regime. #sia #lizzo #bigbelly #haulass

A post shared by Leslie Jordan (@thelesliejordan) on

And this one (which he filmed a few weeks ago at his home in WeHo) where he told us that back in the day, he was every cokehead’s worst nightmare, a greedy coke snorter:

And the time he got arrested while rolling on E:

And the story about how he became a freezer queen with help from Betty White:

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The Freezer Queen. #bostonlegal @bettymwhite

A post shared by Leslie Jordan (@thelesliejordan) on

And the tale of how his Little Bo Peep drunk ass (he’s sober now) got thrown in jail, where he later gave up his cell bed to Robert Downey Jr. So yes, Leslie Jordan deserves 15% of all of RDJ’s earnings!

There’s much, much more of that southern goodness and impeccable storytelling on Leslie’s IG, and honestly, watching him, makes me want to shake a fist (and not in a sexy way) at whoever decided not to pick up the gay Golden Girls TV series. Because Leslie Jordan is like Blanche Deveraux’s gay cousin come-to-life! And Leslie Jordan should be a household name by now, but if I asked my mom if she knew him, she’d say, “I loved her in that lady Ghostbusters movie!” But hopefully this does it, because if something good is going to come out of this mess, it should be that Leslie Jordan becomes a STAH!

Pics: Instagram

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