More drama from Team Taylor Swift, but, this time, it doesn’t involve Scooter Braun or a bunch of anthropomorphic sex-cats. Nope, this one’s an actual life or death crisis. Taylor’s dad, Scott Swift, had to fight off a burglar who broke into his $4 million dollar Tampa Bay penthouse. The burglar, Terrence Hoover, has a rap sheet longer than Taylor’s list of enemies (which he’s now on) .
The Tampa Bay Times reports:
On the day of the burglary, Hoover got past the “fully gated and guarded entrance” and then ran through the parking garage to the emergency stairwell, according to an arrest affidavit. The stairwell remains locked at all times unless someone doesn’t fully close the door, the report said. A security camera recorded Hoover walk up the stairs and exit the stairwell into the penthouse just before 10 p.m., the report states.
Seconds later, Swift returned home through the elevator and watched Hoover run out of his residence. A struggle ensued between the men before Hoover ran away.
Hoover (kinda sounds like Scooter… think about it) called the police a couple of hours later to turn himself in, and is now in jail on a $50,000 bond. His mother told the Tampa Bay Times that he was in the area looking for his estranged wife and kids who are apparently holed up in a church on the water.
No word from Team Swift, but it looks like ol’ Papa Scottie walked away unscathed. You may remember Scott from his now-deactivated Facebook page. He caused a little controversy by posting some conservative “Blue Lives Matter” and anti-immigration memes, which… DUH. He’s a) a dad, b) part of the American 1%, c) A DAD.
Thank JESUS my father does not understand how to make a Facebook account. Nobody tell him it’s free, please! Dad-cheapness is the only reason we are spared a constant barrage of log cabin photos. “This is the cabin covered in snow. This is the cabin covered in snow from another angle. Oh, this one’s a keeper… it’s the cabin.”