Hot Slut Of The Day!

The One Size Fits All Boulder of Colorado!

Any day where my eyeballs are hit with the sight of something that’s rock hard and covered in sticky whiteness is a good day, even if this isn’t really what I had in mind. But I’ll take it! And because the internet is a place where a damn rock can go viral, a rock has gone viral thanks to the description from the cops, which has caused a massive boulder of WTF to block our brains.

Yesterday, a boulder blocked a lane in Colorado, and so the San Miguel Sheriff’s Department tweeted a warning to drivers to watch for police vehicles around the lane-blocking large boulder that was the size of a small boulder. Yes, a large boulder that’s the size of a small boulder. Maybe the sheriff’s department wanted people to stay off the roads, and figured that if they hit people with this impossible-to-solve math equation, their brains would be so paralyzed that they wouldn’t be able to drive.

Large boulder the size of a small boulder is completely blocking east-bound lane Highway 145 mm78 at Silverpick Rd. Please use caution and watch for emergency vehicles in the area. pic.twitter.com/EVMmDf0IJu

— San Miguel Sheriff (@SheriffAlert) January 27, 2020

They later tried to clear shit up by rudely giving the boulder’s measurements. I hope they got consent from the boulder for that!

The boulder that fell onto Highway 145 at Silverpick Rd outside Telluride was approximately 4ftx4ftx4ft (64 cubic ft) and weighed about 10,000lbs. No injuries or vehicle damage. Eastbound lane blocked for about 30 mins until a snow plow was able to move the boulder off highway.

But honestly, I have a feeling that many a dude are going to use that “large boulder the size of a small boulder” line. They’re going to be like, “I’ve got big dick energy in a small dick’s body.” Just call it Henery Hawk dick.

Pic: Twitter