Hot Slut Of The Day!
Nabisco Swiss Cheese Crackers!
Nabisco’s Swiss Cheese Crackers came from the 1980s, and they were little cartoon Swiss cheese-looking crackers that were supposed to taste just like Swiss cheese if Swiss cheese blew its load all over a Nabisco cracker, I guess. Or if a Skarsgard rubbed their dick cheese all over a Nabisco cracker. (Mental note: hunt down a vintage box of Nabisco’s Swiss Cheese Crackers STAT.)
Swiss Cheese Crackers didn’t have a major Swiss cheese taste. It was more as if a thing of Swiss cheese lightly farted all over a cracker. I’m not sure if they made it out of the 80s or not, but Nabisco doesn’t put them out anymore. And there are Swiss Cheese Crackerheads out there whose taste buds still sing out Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! over those crackers. So like with nearly everything that isn’t made anymore, there’s a Bring Back page on Facebook about Nabisco Swiss Cheese Crackers.
In Canada, Christie sells their own Swiss cheese-flavored crackers, so some disciples of Nabisco’s version buy that shit to get their fix. You can get them online for around $40 for 6 boxes. Or you can just go to Canada!
And if you get them in Canada and serve them at your New Year’s Eve party, you can say in an uppity voice, while holding a Red Cup goblet filled with Andre, “Those Swiss crackers are imported from the Realm of the Commonwealth, dahling!”
Pic: Nabisco