Afternoon Crumbs

Now I’m not saying that the makers of that messy Sonic the Hedgehog movie saw everyone losing it over Baby Yoda, and thought, “Quick, miniaturize Sonic, call him Baby Sonic and shove him into the movie,” but I am saying that they just did that. Because there’s a Baby Sonic in the Sonic movie. Honestly, that doesn’t even look like a baby to me. It just looks like a small Sonic. Cheap and lazy! But hey, if Baby Sonic takes attention away from that annoying blatant marketing ploy that is Baby Yoda, I’m all for it. And since you’re all probably going to drag me to the guillotine for talking trash about Baby Yoda, can you please allow me to fix my hair first? – The A.V. Club

Like an overfilled diaper, Justin Bieber will explode all over everyone in 2020 with a new album, tour, and docu-series. It says a lot about humanity that we’ll soon have two documentaries about the life of Bieber and there’s not even one about Stacey Q! – Lainey Gossip

Kelly Marie Tran is only in The Rise of the Skywalker for 76 seconds, which is shitty, but then again, that mess is supposed to be awful, so maybe she’s happy that she’s the short-lasting sparkle in a bit pile of crap – Celebitchy

Great, now everyone’s going to want to fuck Chris Evans’ dog – Pajiba

While many of us were laid out in a coma on the sofa with See’s Candies wrappers all around us, Brooke Burke was out there working hard by posing in a bikini for the pap she called – Drunken Stepfather

Forget dimming the lights, break every bulb on Broadway, because legendary composer Jerry Herman has died – Towleroad

And in more sad wrapped in sad news, Melanie Panayiotou, the sister of George Michael, has reunited with him in the afterworld, three years to the day that he died – Queerty

Pic: Paramount Pictures