Back in May, Gabrielle Union was on The Late Show With James Corden and she talked about her husband, Dwyane Wade‘s new life post-basketball career. While Dwyane may have started his career as a poor person, he ended it as a multi-fuckin-MILLIONAIRE. He’s rich. And like most rich people, he doesn’t know what the shit is going on with the poor folk of the land. Gabrielle talked about how he was amazed by car washes, and veterinarians, and milk costs, and Old Navy. Well Dwyane spoke to Sports Illustrated and he clarified his wife’s comments and yeah, he’s an out of touch rich person.
Sports Illustrated interviewed Dwyane and of course he had to talk about those hilarious comments Gabrielle made about him being an alien from planet 1-Percenter. Here’s the comments if you missed them:
Dwyane clarified things, specifically Gabrielle’s Old Navy revelation. Yes, Dwyane was “freaking out” over the store but it wasn’t that big a deal… although he definitely does make it sound like it was. The thing is, he just was too famous to do anything himself at one point. And getting out of that constantly coddled/worshipped and adored by all-phase can be hard. Here’s his breakdown:
“Okay so, what I was freaking out about—if you want to call it freaking out—was the prices. I’m sure some guys do, but I got to a point, especially being so known in Miami—which is a good thing but at times when it comes to personal life stuff, it can be tough—where I hadn’t been to a store in so long. I had a chef to go shopping, a stylist to do this, all that. I don’t really go shopping, so I don’t really know the prices of stuff.
So I go into Old Navy and I start buying stuff. So I grabbed what I felt was like, [laughs], a lot of stuff, like it’s got to be $100,000. Not a $100,000 but just speaking in that sense. I got up to the register and it was like $500. I was like, ‘Holy shit, I thought this was way more.’ So I’m kind of freaking out about that kind of stuff. And just to be able to be in L.A. and go shopping and nobody notices me was a cool experience. I never thought I would say that 16 years ago when I wanted people to notice me. Now I’m going places hoping people don’t, so I can enjoy myself and not have anxiety or anything.”
“Really dad? …Old Navy excited you? We can afford Balmain,” his gay son in the future, probably.
Can you imagine thinking you were going to spend $100,000 at Old Navy? You’d need to buy the whole-ass store. Dwyane is so out of touch I can only imagine how amazing his life must have been as a professional basketball player. Did he wipe his own ass? Like, probably not. Better start getting used to it–Gabrielle will handle that ass, but not in that way. I guess he could just buy himself a $500,000 Goop-brand crystal, shaman-blessed bidet that cleans your ass and heals haemorrhoids?