Night Crumbs

While paying tribute to Madonna’s Like A Virgin performance from the first MTV VMAs, Lizzo did Truth Hurts at the BET Awards, complete with some of her signature twerk-tastic flute dancing. So, let’s see after singing and dancing, Lizzo played the flute and then played it while bouncing her ass. “Pfft, whatever” said an unimpressed 7-year-old me who got a 4-second-long recorder solo in the holiday pageant – Lainey Gossip 

Holy water with Cristal Connors, DUH! – Pajiba

Soothe your case of the Mondays with a serving of Bacon butt – (NSWFish) OMG Blog

Felix’s human better stretch every day and practice holding her breath for 35 minutes, because I have a feeling she’s going to suddenly wake up in the washing machine as Felix is sitting on top, filing his nails – Towleroad

Here’s Lindsay Lohan working the finest “designer” fashions bought from the trunk of a counterfeiter’s car in an alley way in Athens somewhere – Drunken Stepfather

And three seconds after this picture was taken, a memaw from the 1970s sat on Aubrey Plaza and read a copy of Reader’s Digest – Popoholic

Sofia Richie looks like a Fembot who time-traveled to the 90s to try to make it as a Fly Girl – Hollywood Tuna

Taylor Swift buying a $5 million house near the Kennedy compound made Conor Kennedy almost reach for a restraining order form – Celebitchy

Katherine McPhee rubbed on her future husband’s 69-year-old nipples while taking a dip in Mykonos – Just Jared

And in sad news, orgasms will not be made today, chandeliers will not sparkle, and any self-respecting designer Beverly Hills boutique will close in tribute to Judith Krantz who is now in heaven where she’s hopefully slathered in diamonds while luxuriating in a bubble bath  – Jezebel

Pic: YouTube