Night Crumbs
Moby will not shut the fuck up about Natalie Portman denying that they ever dated when she was 18. Moby says that he and Natalie had a “brief, innocent, and consensual” romance in 1999, and thinks everyone should focus on more important things. Says the mess who keeps bringing this up. I mean, he really, really wants us all to believe that when he was a 33-year-old, he was sleeping on a barely legal girl’s college dorm room bed. Is he trying to get into some elite Barely Legal Appreciation Club, or something? Dane Cook and Scott Disick, please let him in, so he can shut up already – Jezebel
A judge is de-messing Hayden Panettiere’s life for her a bit by ordering her allegedly abusive boyfriend Brian Hickerson to stay away from her – Just Jared
Marion Cotillard looks like an early-90s sensei who has a side gig as a Fly Girl – Lainey Gossip
Black and blue aren’t only the colors that the peens of gays turned while furiously fapping about Richard Madden and Brandon Flynn, it’s also the colors they wore while going out to dinner together – OMG Blog
Farrah Abraham is giving you rode hard and put away wet Muppetness – (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
Kenan Thompson is going to be on Saturday Night Live until the end of end’s time – Pajiba
Hmm… I never really thought of Listerine as a butt douche before. It may sting less than the mixture of ammonia and turpentine I usually use – Towleroad
If watching Kate Beckinsale lift a giant, heavy goth Lifesaver is your thing… – Hollywood Tuna
Rebecca Gayheart says she spent a year trying to die after killing a child in a car accident – Celebitchy
Pic: Wenn.com
