TMZ is reporting that Jack Osbourne got jumped. But this was not your standard drunken after-the-show brawl–Jack was sneak-attacked while sitting at a coffee shop like a regular person. Maybe it was Dean Cain looking for Egg Boy?
Jack Osbourne lives a relatively publicity-free life. Unlike sister, Kelly Osbourne–who also has trouble with coffee shops–we don’t really see him on TV or in the tabloids. I mean, there was that divorce he went through with ex-wife Lisa Osbourne, but even that seemed to be relatively drama-free. Well Jack is FINALLY in the news, but not really for anything he did himself. On Wednesday, while his dad is laid up in the hospital after canceling all tour dates, Jack was just chilling at a coffee shop in Studio City on the patio enjoying the California sun before the ozone gets too depleted from our poisoning of the environment and the sun’s rays become unbearable for our skin. He was enjoying his–I’m assuming–non-iced coffee (only gays and Ariana Grande drink iced coffee) when out of nowhere danger swooped in.
Sources tell TMZ that a man, who appeared to be homeless (or a hipster) came up from nowhere and “sucker punched” Jack in the head. Jack’s back was to the street so he didn’t see him coming, which is mistake #1. You should always keep yourself facing the entrances of a location in case someone is coming in to kill you mob-hit style. That’s how it’s done in the streets! Jack got up and threw his coffee at the alleged homeless man in retaliation, and the guy ran off.
Law enforcement sources say the cops tracked down the attacker and he was so combative, that the cops tased his ass. The suspect was then arrested for battery and assault.
TMZ got word from a rep for Jack who says that he’s fine.
Wow, not even Studio City is safe anymore. That homeless guy is just lucky Jack was by himself. Imagine Mama Bear Sharon Osbourne saw someone attack her son? She’d tear that guy limb from limb in a flurry of British cursing. The police would have had to tase her.