Afternoon Crumbs

April 5, 2019 / Posted by:

Charlize Theron says she’s “shockingly single” and has been single for ten years. I don’t think it’s that shocking that Charlize has been single for that long. If I was her, I’d be single too, because I’d be too busy taking in all the hot dick thrown at me to commit to just one. And now we know that Charlize saw a hypnotist to erase her brain and coochie of the memory of being engaged to Sean Penn!¬† – Lainey Gossip¬†

So what I’m getting from this Lil Nas X and Billy Ray Cyrus thing is that in order to get your song on the Billboard country charts you gotta have a white guy on it, or be Hootie from Hootie and the Blowfish – Pajiba

Olivia Culpo is giving you side tit and hip bone – Popoholic

Okay, but I’d like Billie Jean King to know that I’ve been boycotting The Beverly Hills Hotel since birth, and yes, mostly because I can’t afford it, but still! – Towleroad

Billy Ray Cyrus is probably so disappointed in Noah Cyrus’ underage drinking and only because she’s not drinking moonshine. Way to shame the Cyrus family name, Noah! – Drunken Stepfather

It must be Friday because for a minute there I thought Candice Swanepoel was pulling some Exorcist shit and her head was on the wrong way – Hollywood Tuna

Whatever Ben Stiller paid that woman to fawn over him like that wasn’t enough, because she WENT. FOR. IT. – Celebitchy

Celine Dion tells us what we already knew – Just Jared

PODCAST NOTE: The Dlisted podcast has gone on an unexpected Spring Break and partly because I have another eyeball surgery happening soon. Allison and I will be back to terrorize your ears in May!


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