Hot Slut Of The Day!

Robert Smith isn’t today’s HSOTD because he’s the lead singer of the Cure, or because he decided early on he’s not responsible enough to raise a human child, or because he let us know that boys aren’t born with tear ducts, or because his voice woke up the Emo in all of us, or because he’s the God of every goth cholita, or because he currently works “crazy cat lady at a funeral” glamour like no other. Robert Smith is today’s HSOTD because of the very on-brand interview he gave to a sequins-slathered lightning bolt of PEPPY! If you were or are an angsty high school goth and have found yourself trying to have a conversation with the most popular girl in school who is filled to the top with boiling perkiness and excitement, you will relate.

The Cure was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in NYC on Friday night, and when you’re inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, there’s a good chance that you’ll have to do some press. Robert Smith has made it clear that he’d rather slow dance with a Care Bear while wearing bright yellow directly under the sunlight than have to answer questions in an interview. But in this interview, Robert Smith proved that he’s a master at answering questions when a nervous Carrie Keagan hit him with a wave of PERKY by yelling at him and wondering if she’s as OMGEXCITED as he is, to which he answered:

“Um, by the sounds of it, no.”

And the eyeliner-covered side-eye he threw at her is just as perfect as his answer. It’s the same side-eye I throw when someone asks me if I want to hold their laughing and happy baby.

This is like Jane Lane and Brittany Taylor from Daria: The Latter Years, or like Garfield and Nermal if Garfield and Nermal were humans:

this is the funniest start to an interview i have ever seen i love robert smith man pic.twitter.com/7H4okzPX0L

— al (@_hidingwithboys) March 30, 2019

That’s also what it would look like if my Monday morning hangover and my Monday mid-morning caffeine high tried to have a conversation. Or like the sun talking to a black cloud.

The rest of the interview is also awkward perfection including this:

Carrie: Maybe we just need a few drinks.

RS: God forbid.

Robert’s interview with Carrie is in the first five minutes of the video below, and now I really want to see them co-host a morning show together:

Robert Smith cared so little that you’d think it was Thursday. And today isn’t Friday, but I’m still in love with that entire interview.

Pics: Wenn.com