Night Crumbs

March 6, 2019 / Posted by:

International treasure Alex Trebek has announced awful, heart-ruining news: he has stage 4 pancreatic cancer. Alex knows how grim a stage 4 pancreatic cancer prognosis can be, but he’s going to fight it as if it was Sean Connery, and is asking for good thoughts. He’s also going to keep hosting Jeopardy!. I’ll take “FUCK CANCER” for FUCKCANCERthousand, Alex. – Just Jared

Random is going to have to find a new couple to praise, because Andrew Garfield and Rita Ora are done, and one source says it’s because he was worried about her “life in the spotlight.” Lainey thinks that might mean Andrew believes Rita is a pap-calling fame whore. Sure, that works, but I take that to mean that it was physically difficult for him to be with her when she kept literally chasing a spotlight that never landed on her because it has no idea who she is. Even Spider-Man couldn’t keep up!  – Lainey Gossip 

There’s going to be a Hello Kitty movie, and if Mariah Carey isn’t choregrapher, producer, and costume designer of it the same way Paula Abdul WAS on the Bratz movie, then put it down before it even begins – Pajiba

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m into Hailey Baldwin’s look and only because it’s very conservative Matrix universe call girl/hit woman – Drunken Stepfather

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m into Halsey’s look and only because it’s very conservative Matrix universe lot lizard/hit woman – Popoholic

The Rock Hudson biopic is happening and watch Hollywood fuck this up by proving that Nick Jonas’ gay baiting has paid off when he’s cast – Towleroad

Okay, but how many times did Brazil’s president fap to that before tweeting it? – OMG Blog

Olivia Newton-John has been through it thanks to that demonic shit wart known as cancer, but says she’s feeling well – SOW

If Duchess Meghan ever decides she needs to sit her pregnant ass down and take a break from smiling at events with Prince Hot Ginge, I’ll gladly take her place. I’ve even got a giant skinny fat gut to place my hand on – Celebitchy


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