When “first dance” time comes up at a wedding reception, that’s usually my cue to head to the bar, because when you’ve seen one grossly in love couple slow dance to Etta James’ At Last, you’ve seen all grossly in love couples slow dance to Etta James’ At Last. But at the wedding of PJ and Noah, they gave their guests a show! Surprisingly, their first dance extravaganza didn’t end with guests throwing them a Tony, the mirror ball trophy from Dancing with the Stars, and fat ass bouquets of roses.
They took their guests on a musical journey of DANCE!!! They started with Barbra Streisand cooing out A Quiet Thing, and just when guests started to think it was a normal first dance and now was the time to put their skills of falling asleep with their eyes open to the test, shit turned up. The DJ pretended that something was wrong with the track before switching to Conga by Miami Sound Machine, and that’s when the invisible red velvet curtain really dropped and the show began.
They went from Conga to C+C Music Factory’s Everybody Dance Now to Madonna’s Vogue to KC and The Sunshine Band’s Get Down Tonight to Puttin’ On The Ritz. But the sparkly cherry on top of that dance sundae was their finale number: (I’ve Had) The Time Of My Life complete with the Dirty Dancing lift. The form! They put some work into achieving that 10s-across-the-board lift. Baby put herself in the corner out of shame.
This is sweet and impressive, but not something I would do. What if my new husband jacked up his back while lifting me? There goes our wedding night fuck times. No, thank you. And the only thing I want to leap onto on my wedding night is some wedded dick.