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The fuck noises of ecstasy that interrupted a tennis match in Florida!
I’ve never been to a tennis match before, but my guess is that the loudest human-made sound you’d hear (besides the sound of tennis grunts) is the sound of snoring, because that shit is boring. But at a match between Frances Tiafoe and Mitchell Krueger at the Sarasota Open yesterday, the sound that humped its way into the ears of everyone there was the sound of a couple trying to earn the Grand Slam in sex times. Deadspin says that Frances was about to serve in the second set when (at the 0:15 mark in the video after the cut) the players were upstaged by two luckies getting theirs. Frances perked up the same way many of us perk up when we hear our neighbors having more fun than us.
Surprisingly, one of the commenters didn’t say, “I didn’t know Monica Seles came out of retirement and is playing a match next to us.” But one of the commentators did think that someone’s phone in the stands was loudly playing porn. (Side note: I would be that bitch who was playing porn on his phone at a tennis match when his headphons connector accidentally slipped out of the jack hole and blasted the bone moans to everyone.) They went on with the game as the sex sounds caused a child to cover up his ears.
It kept going and at the 2:00 mark in the video below, Frances screamed, “It can’t be that good!” The commentators realized that the pre-jizz hump wails were live and coming an apartment that was across the lake. You know you’re getting dicked good when your moans travel across a body of water. The score on the court might’ve been 40/15, but across the way, the score was love/love.
Frances ended up winning the match, but what really made him happy was the sound of fucking. He said this on Twitter: “hahaha I couldn’t be happier when I heard that.”
They really should’ve stopped the match, told the kids to get out of there and listen to the REAL exciting match going down.
Pic: YouTube