Night Crumbs

October 10, 2016 / Posted by:

Shailene Woodley got arrested today for protesting the Dakota Access Pipeline in Sioux County, North Dakota. Shailene! How are you going to sunbathe your vagina if you’re locked up in the chokey? And now I suddenly have the image of Shailene lying on the floor of her prison cell with her legs up while trying to coochie-catch a little bit of sunshine coming through her window – HuffPo

Usain Bolt and Harry Styles went to the same club on the same night, which means they either just went to the same club on the same night, or they partied together, or they’re fucking. I’m a fan of reasonable scenarios, so I’m going with the third –  Lainey Gossip 

A few former Secret Service agents have found themselves going from protecting the President of the United States to protecting the President of Fame Whores – Reality Tea 

Rita Ora is serving “hooker at a third-tier bordello on Halloween night” glamour – Drunken Stepfather

In case you were wondering, yes, Jon Voight is still a delusional mess – Celebitchy

Pete Campbell as Colonel Sanders looks like the white-haired baby of Buddy Holly and k.d. langThe Superficial 

Kanye West looks so sad in this old promo pic with a topless Lady Gaga, and probably because the photographer wouldn’t let him take his top off too. And his chichis are definitely bigger and juicier than Gaga’s! – (NSFW) The Nip Slip 

The name James Hill is as foreign to me as proper grammar, but he’s now one of my favorite celebrities thanks to two words: HARD PEEN!!!! – (NSFW) OMG Blog

Sara Ramirez came out as bi – Towleroad

Wonder Woman is giving me tons of fucking sequins – Popoholic

Someone needs to introduce Bella Thorne and her hickey to a frozen spoon – Hollywood Tuna

Disney thinks that what we really need is a non-traditional and edgy live-action Aladdin movie directed by Guy RitchiePopsugar

Ginger Spice is having a second baby. She named her first kid (Bluebell Madonna) after an ice cream brand and a pop star, and if she does that with her second, I hope she goes with Talenti Martika – Just Jared

Lifetime has already shot the umbrella scene for their Brit Brit Spears biopic and it looks like they got it all wrong. Honestly, I’d be more worried about Lifetime if they actually got it right. They’ve turned getting it wrong into an art form!  – IDLYITW

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! – Jezebel

Pic: Facebook

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