Night Crumbs
Goopy Paltrow’s friend Mario Batali burped up his thoughts about a couple of her exes. Mario liked Brad Pitt, but really wasn’t into Ben Affleck and he even made a nanny joke. I love that Mario Batali throws nanny shade at Ben Affleck, but his opinion is invalid as long as he insists on wearing those Satanic shoes made from the devil’s colon. Invalid! – Lainey Gossip
We could’ve lived in a world where Brangelina weren’t a thing and Gwen Stefani won a Razzie for playing Mrs. Smith – Celebitchy
I thought that headline said “Jose Canseco’s Nipples” and I got so confused…. – Drunken Stepfather
Ramona Singer’s mouth farted out the duh of duhs – Reality Tea
I’m sure one of the Duggar sons will be looking to “court” soon, so Backdoor Farrah should hold out for one of them – The Superficial
If you play tennis, then follow Charli XCX’s lead and wear this sporty yet elegant ensemble the next time you hit the court – Egotastic!
Colton Haynes is doing Scream Queens 2 – Towleroad
Emma Roberts’ bringing “dominatrix secretary” to Comic-On gets a yes from me, but I have a feeling that her suffocating, overheated chichis don’t feel the same way – Popoholic
The Fixer Uppers from HGTV are getting their own magazine – Starcasm
Chloe Grace Moretz, Debra Messing, America Ferrera, Eva Longoria, Lena Dunham, Katy Perry, Demi Lovato and Alicia Keys are all speaking at next week’s Democratic National Convention. I know, no Susan Sarandon. I’m overfilled with SHOCK! – IDLYITW
Emily RideAJetSki’s nalgas, here they are – Hollywood Tuna
The Fappening hacker will spend the next 6 months fapping in a prison cell bunk bed – HuffPo
I guess I need to start watching Bates Motel again so that I can witness RiRi’s impeccable acting as Marion Crane – Just Jared
My dream of Hillary Clinton picking Angelyne as her running mate didn’t come true…. – Popsugar
Pic: PBS