Night Crumbs

Tarzan starring tall Swedish glass of leche Alexander Skarsgard and Margot Robbie may be headed for FlopVille like Pan. Well, there’s only one thing that can save it from being a bomb at the box office: PEEN! 3D PEEN! IMAX PEEN! Just peen! – Lainey Gossip 

Here are the two hookers who allegedly partied with Lamar Odom for days – Drunken Stepfather

Lea Michele thinks her ass is a “showstopper.” Well, since her ass is such a showstopper, she should’ve presented it to Jessica Lange on the red carpet. Maybe Jessica Lange would’ve stopped for her showstopper ass. (Probably not) – Celebitchy

Stroke be damned! Kim Zolciak and her stupid waist trainer shall never be parted – Reality Tea 

Tara Reid’s sleazy boyfriend looks like a character named “Douchebag #1″ in an Adam Sandler movie. I so would… – The Superficial 

Rachel Bilson’s dress would look so much better wrapped around the cushions of a rattan sofa in an old lady’s Boca Raton sunroom – Popoholic

Rita Ora forgot her pants – The Nip Slip 

Germany’s finest rose is more covered up than usual. She must’ve gone to church right after the event  – Hollywood Tuna 

Bernie Sanders went full Bernie Sanders on Ellen – Towleroad

Brooklyn Decker and Andy Roddick named their baby Hank. I hope they gave Hank her last name, because Hank Decker sounds like the name of a frazzled police detective in a 70s cop show – IDLYITW

I’ve read the message around your neck LOUD and CLEAR, Lena Dunham! – SOW

Scott Disick has temporarily left rehab to see Lamar Odom in Las Vegas – Starcasm

Kaley Cuoco and Johnny Galecki aren’t bumping nipples again. Okay. – HuffPo

Lamar Odom lying on his death bed kan’t keep the Kartrashians from Instagram – Just Jared 

This is what Celine Dion’s son Ruh-nay Charles looks like now – Popsugar

I’m surprised The Mighty O didn’t hit T.I. with a lightning bolt – OMG Blog

NOTE: Apologies for the shortage of posts today. I had a doctor’s appointment that went a little longer than I thought it would. I didn’t expect people in Hazmat suits to come into the room, drag me into some kind of tent, hose me down with bleach and inject me with antibiotics. That’s standard, right?

Pic: YouTube