One week after she announced that she was knocked-up with a tiny hand-crocheted ukelele-strumming vintage fetus, UsWeekly says that Zooey Deschanel is engaged to her baby daddy producer boyfriend Jacob Pechenik. Congrats, Zooey, you just hit the hipster wedding jackpot: adorable pregnant bride.
Zooey was married once before to Death Cab for Cutie singer Ben Gibbard from 2009 to 2011, but that ended due to “irreconcilable differences” (aka they couldn’t stop fighting over whose turn it was to sit cross-legged in the living room singing broody songs to no one in particular while they strummed on a second-hand acoustic guitar). But maybe Jacob really likes the never-ending sound of Christmas carols coming out of Zooey’s sing-hole, or he’s got a good set of noise-cancelling headphones and doesn’t care.
Baby Deschanel-Pechenik is due some time this summer, and UsWeekly doesn’t say when Zooey and Jacob are planning on getting married, but I’m going to guess it will be soon. Zooey strikes me as one of those old fashioned types that need a ring on their finger before they push out a kid, so I won’t be surprised to see a baby-bloated Zooey wrapped in 5 yards of thrift store lace curtains clutching ten wild daisies in one hand and a barf bag in the other as she shuffles down the aisle of a vintage bowling alley.
And I really want to see the quirky engagement ring Jacob proposed to her with. I know he’s only been with Zooey for about 6 months, so I hope he had enough time to find a taxidermied squirrel tooth set in an antique gold harmonica.