Night Crumbs

March 14, 2014 / Posted by:

Three seconds after this picture of ASkars leaving the gym was taken, the slots in those parking meters squirted out jizz. They might be pregnant now – Lainey Gossip

By the end of the first episode of Celebrity Apprentice, the only thing left in the boardroom will be a pile of blood-covered polyester weaves. I can’t wait! – Reality Tea

Oh please, like the refined and delicate amphibian lord Bendadick Cumsinbatches really gets into fist fights like a commoner – Celebitchy

The time I mistook Joanna Krupa for a male Wonky McValtrex impersonator – Drunken Stepfather

What’s really shocking is that Shaq took time away from downloading apps to play Plead the Fifth with Andy Cohen – Towleroad

Yup, that’s definitely the face of an asshole who just got a DUI and made a baby with Michael Lohan – The Superficial

Vanessa Hudgens looks like she’s wearing a leather car seat – Hollywood Tuna

Kirk Cameron just has a face that you want to hit with a Subway foot long – Pajiba

Based on that sketch, Amanda Bynes should skip fashion school and design Bratz dolls – IDLYITW

Correction: An Avril Lavigne and Nickelback tour would be the most depressing (and diarrhea-inducing) tour ever – Jezebel

Hipsters. – Popsugar

The Real Housewives of Atlanta’s class dunce is not dating that dictator’s son – Reality Tea

Gross, but I’d still let him stick the tip in – Tosh.0

Hilary Duff’s legs look like a pack of Twizzlers – Popoholic

Zoe Saldana is going to “let herself go” after marriage, which means that she’ll eat two lemon seeds for dinner instead of just one – ICYDK

Xtina’s (made up) fuck list is here, and let’s be real, we’ve all done the guy in front of us at Chipolte – OMG Blog

Ricky Martin gives the paps a hairy nips and tramp stamp show on the balcony – Just Jared

Happy Fap (and Treasure Trails) Friday! – The Berry

I see that White Oprah hacked Kate Dennings’ Twitter – SOW

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