Afternoon Crumbs

November 13, 2013 / Posted by:

Mimi says that doing American Idol was like going to work in Hell with Satan. I kept waiting for her to say, “….if Satan had ass implants, smelled like make-up and was even more flammable than he already is,” but she probably stopped herself since she knew we knew who she was talking about – Lainey Gossip

The Kardashians would like the number to the baker who made that cum-spewing peen cake – Drunken Stepfather

Amy Poehler is giving me young Beverly D’AngeloThe Berry

I don’t know if the tag sticking out is attached to Courtney Stodden’s bikini or her plastic titty balls – The Superficial

Who knew that Sacha Baron Cohen’s wife would turn out to be the voice of reason? – Celebitchy

The White Witch is coming to American Horror Story: CovenTowleroad

If the world was a perfect place, a trap door to the underworld would open up under anybody who buys Kardashian krap to meet Khloe KardashianReality Tea

Oh, don’t mind that lady, she’s just checking to make sure everything’s there before she ships Nina Agdal off to Leonardo DiCaprio’s house – Hollywood Tuna

Um, Kelly, I think you’ve got a little bit of Jeremy’s canned hair on your shirt” is what Kelly Brook’s friends will say to her all the time now that she’s dating Jeremy PivenIDLYITW

“Why is everyone screaming ‘Ms. Gosselin’ at me?!” – Popoholic

The CW is bringing back Tales from the Darkside. If they really want to show us something scary, they should just show behind-the-scenes footage of Ty Ty Banks shooting Top ModelOMG Blog

MTV is copying Big Brother now – ICYDK

If Lindsay Lohan and Chris Brown fell in love… – Tosh.0

Taylor Swift is still that fifth year high school senior who befriends all the juniors – Just Jared

Disappointment is me seeing the headline “Prince Harry Shows His South Pole…” before seeing a picture of THE QUEEN holding some snowsuit – Popsugar

Err, somebody set Nicole Scherzinger’s internal calendar to the current date, because she obviously thinks it’s still Slut-O-Ween – Moe Jackson

RIP Body of Proof SOW

The Wahlburgers reality show is happening – Videogum

Channing Tatum’s football uniform costume needs more bulge – I’m Not Obsessed

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