Amanda Bynes Terrorizes The Ritz-Carlton

July 19, 2013 / Posted by:

A front desk employee at one of the Ritz-Carltons in Manhattan has joined 99.9999999999% of the population in the Uglies According to Amanda Bynes Club. Welcome, fellow ugly!

Amanda’s wig was thrown into the gutter where it belongs yesterday after the Ritz-Carlton kicked her out for making a front desk employee cry and filling her hotel room with weed smoke. A source tells TMZ that immediately after Amanda checked in, she started toking up every day, all day. The hotel staff quickly learned what most of us have known for months and months: when you ask Amanda to stop doing something, she’s going to consult with her talking bong and then keep doing it. Amanda kept smoking the good shit in her room and tried to cover up the smell with some kind of chemical. I’m guessing that chemical was meth smoke, because nothing covers up weed smoke like meth smoke.

Amanda just couldn’t stop at filling the hotel with weed smoke, she also filled one of the front desk employees with sadness and the rejection one feels when the most beautiful and perfect beauty in the entire world calls you ugly. Amanda told one of the front desk girls that she was too ugly to check her in and offered the girl the name of her plastic surgeon. The girl cried on the spot.

Amanda was supposed to check out at noon, but she got kicked out hours before that. TMZ’s source says that Amanda made her way to La Guardia and is now coming here to L.A. to call all of us ugly.

There’s many reasons to cry, but Amanda Bynes calling you ugly is not one of them. First of all, Amanda Bynes’ Vanity Fair column tells me that she’s trolling at least 50% of the time and is really Joaquin Phoenix in an Amanda Bynes skin suit. Second of all, Amanda thinks everyone is ugly and thinks everyone needs at least 4 nose jobs. Amanda Bynes calling a ho ugly is like Gerard Butler going up to a ho and saying, “I’d like to fuck you.” He says that to everyone and everything. There’s zero exceptions to the rule.

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