Afternoon Crumbs
RiRi took a much-needed break from her daily grind of getting drunk while wearing bikini tops to get drunk while wearing bikini tops. You’ve earned it, RiRi! – Popsugar
Taylor Swift’s mom supervises all of her sleepovers with Harry Styles, because somebody has to make sure that they’re 9pm pillow fights aren’t disturbing the neighbors – Lainey Gossip
Iggy Azalea needs to be spanked again for stealing Traci Lords’ look – Drunken Stepfather
The California Hamster Association is mad at Justin Bieber and not because he gave his hamster to Richard Gere. Yes, that’s me keeping urban legends from the 90s alive – Celebitchy
“Yes, honey, this finger goes up Simon Cowell’s culito hole every night and it’s going to make me a very rich woman, thankyouverymuch!” – Carmen Electra – The Superficial
Henry Rollins’ keeps fighting the good fight – Towleroad
I don’t know who Claudia Galanti is, but the photo agencies have had pictures of her in a bikini every day this week and I’m starting to get concerned. She’s been in the sun so much that her silicone titty sacks are starting to melt – Hollywood Tuna
The more surprising headline would be: John Mayer ISN’T Cheating On Katy Perry – ICYDK
Yes, Holly Madison is whoring out every second of her pregnancy, but I’m more concerned that her dress has got me craving blue Twizzlers, because I don’t think they make blue Twizzlers anymore – IDLYITW
Presenting Bruce Jenner’s nightly beauty regimen – The Berry
Geri Spice keeps the paparazzi from getting shots of her chonies, looks like she’s busting into the Can-Can while doing so – Popoholic
Oh, I see Jennifer Aniston came out with a new line of kitchen accessories – OMG Blog
Xtina or truck stop hooker working the holiday shift? – Just Jared
LeAnn Rimes really needs to stop taking laxatives before appearances – SOW
When the write-up is better than the subject – Crunk + Disorderly
Drew Barrymore thinks it’s a little incestous that Kristen Wiig is licking on a peen she used to lick on – The Frisky
But when are we ever going to get current bikini pictures of La Bruja? – Hollywood Rag
I think I just suffered a steroid overdose from watching the Pain & Gain trailer – I’m Not Obsessed
My guess is…. Fabio? – Cityrag