Anna Faris adopted a Chihuahua named Pete four years ago, and for some reason, she decided she didn’t want the pooch anymore so she found him a new home. Pete either ran away from his new humans or his new humans dumped him on the street, because he was found on Friday in a bad way. TMZ says that Pete was found wandering the streets and was all emaciated. Pete was taken to the vet and when his microchip was ran, Anna’s name and the name of the shelter she adopted him from popped up. The shelter, Kinder4Rescue, is pissed at Anna and slapped her ass with a fine for breach of contract. When Anna adopted Pete, she agreed to pay the $5,000 fine if she ever re-homed him. Most shelters want you to give the dog back to them if it doesn’t work out. This is giving me shades of Ellen DeGeneres’ dog adoption drama…
Laurel Kinder, the owner of Kinder4Rescue in North Hollywood, tells TMZ that Anna has been put on their do-not-adopt list and she will be forced to pay a $5,000 fine for breaking the agreement. Anna hasn’t been answering Lauren’s calls. The shelter is also considering suing Anna. Anna and Chris Pratt aren’t in California right now, but they’re supposedly working on getting poor Pete back. I’m going to choose to believe that when Anna and Chris walk through their front door, they’ll find Pete dropping a shit log on one of their shoes while throwing a look that clearly says, “Oh, so now that you bitches are getting bad PR you want me here? Just make sure your photographer gets my good side in the ‘reunion’ picture you’re going to put on Instagram.” And yes, I’m also choosing to believe that Pete can say all of that with just one look.
This isn’t the first time that these two Cruella De Vils gave an animal away. Five years ago, Chris Pratt got hit with a lot of hate when he used Twitter to find a home for his 15-year-old cat. Anna and Chris were trying to make a baby at the time and didn’t think it was a good idea to have their old, mean cat around. The cat was also caca-ing all over the house, so they were apparently afraid of that toxoplasmosis shit. So Chris dumped the old pussy on a stranger from Twitter.
If Anna and Chris have anymore animals, those pets better start stashing cash, hoarding non-perishable food items and gathering blackmail material to use against them. Because the second they sprout a grey hair or sass Anna and Chris, they may find themselves out the door.