Once the bald Shih Tzu whose hair was used to make a wig for John Travolta stops shivering, it should be grateful that it has the ability to grow hair and can help Scientology’s sexiest pin-up (sorry, Kirstie Alley) take his glamour and beauty to the next level. With ten jars of Bonne Bell foundation smeared across his face and half of the Westminster Dog Show on top of his head, John Travolta graced the opening of Breitling’s flagship store in London with his presence. David Beckham was also there, but as Nancy Pelosi would say, “Who cares?” John Travolta’s wig > Becks
I’ve always made fun of John Travolta’s busted down, tragic wigs and hairpieces, but I can’t make fun of this one. Not since the Red Sea has there been such a glorious part and those fake dandruff balls (or maybe those are dried cum flakes) add an authentic touch. We also have to give him a standing ovation for that under-chin goatee. If you turn your head upside down and look at his chin, it kind of looks like a fat Shar Pei wearing an oversized yarmulke made of hair. That under-chin fur patch isn’t only a beauty statement, it’s also highly functional. Do you know how many taints and nutsacks were exfoliated with that thing? There’s a lot of smooth taints out there and they owe it all to John Travolta’s loofah patch.