Amanda Bynes Really Learned Her Lesson
To commemorate the one week anniversary of her DUI and the three week anniversary of getting pulled over for talking and driving, Amanda Bynes drove her own ass to Chateau Marmont and Greystone Manor to party with her friends. The paps caught Amanda texting behind the wheel before she ran up over the curb while trying to park. Who knows if Amanda's tongue even touched booze last night, but I find from personal experience when I'm standing in the middle of a club surrounded by sweaty hos thinking they're the shit, the only thing I want to do is eat an entire bottle of Jack. Instead of texting, Amanda needs to use her iPhone to look up the synopsis for Crack & Me: The Lindsay Lohan Story, because she's obviously involuntarily remaking that shit and doesn't know what happens next.
When are these bitches going to learn that driving Billy Joel-style is no way to drive through life? Isn't driving drunk really hard, anyway? Why would you want to ruin your buzz by trying to focus on not sending yourself or others to Jesus? That seems really stressful. Just do what all smart-thinking sluts do. Either find a sober trick to go home with or drag yourself to the nearest Denny's and face plant right into a stack of pancakes until you're good enough to drive. What L.A. really needs, besides a Piggly Wiggly (I will so move back if L.A. gets a Piggly Wiggly), is a Save a Ho car service complete with an open bar in the back. Oh, the Save a Ho car service should also have a foot surgeon in its backseat, because Amanda's hooves like they are one OW away from quitting her ankles.
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Does anyone else think her "look" is unattractive? She's not the prettiest to begin with but then the hair and makeup and it's all fug.
what a loser. who is she? lol
Unless you are waiting for the call for the kidney transplant, there is no reason to be on the phone or texting. While driving. Right after a DUII. Shit for brains.
People pay $1000 for hooker shoes that require lining your whole damn foot in Band-Aids!
No wonder all these idiots think they can "design" shoes.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:44pm.
Submitted by NDNchief on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:26pm.
". I say that because don't the Elite Hollywood clubs only let in 2.5 black people."
i think the limit is now 4.5 black people. kardashian's ass alone counts as 2.5 black people.
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Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ! ! ! !
I try not to think of K.Kartrashian, but, you made me visualize. Dammit.
Twatty, are you feeling better these days? I know you were doing all kinds of stuff to get enough iron! Hope you've had success... hun! ;)
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"Ayúdame, no puedo!" - MK
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If I had the money to pay someone to drive for me like these fuckers, I would. Driving is shitty.
I would NOT hire late prince Diana's driver to be sure though. The guy did get paid to send people to Jesus, so I'll pass.
I laughed when i heard a new show is "dont trust the bitch in apt. 23". Wow. More like "don't trust the bitch in room 23!" . Google diana jenkins amanda's pimp
i always appreciate the "she looks good so why is she doing wrong stuff" point of view. like only ugly people can do things like drink and drive and text and drive and it's ok. but if you have a nice body? WTF ARE YOU DOING!!!
this girl makes me sad. she's crying out for help and attention, and acting like lindsay lohan is how she's going to do it. i just want to shake her by the shoulders, lock her up in my place, give her some coffee and say, wtf is your problem and who's been doing your injections!
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"Fatsa or thinsa you still a bitchsa. :p. *poses with arms up for all future picsas* lol" - guest
UMMMM, who is this average looking ho who thinks she is hot??? I have never seen her in anything, and I don't watch teeny bopper movies...I don't even know who the Twihard people are...sorry, but I don't feel like I am missing anything, she looks like a Hohan wannabe, have fun with that role, whoever you are!!!
I just don't understand this. Amanda Bynes is somewhat talented and very cute with a rocking little body, yet she apparently wants to become blowhan 2.0; what's her deal? First, she makes a ridiculous "I'm retiring" announcement, then takes it back less than a month later and she becomes a boozy party girl, now she's driving drunk & getting DUIs and generally acting like an out-of-control dumbass. What gives?
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Submitted by NDNchief on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 3:26pm.
". I say that because don't the Elite Hollywood clubs only let in 2.5 black people."
i think the limit is now 4.5 black people. kardashian's ass alone counts as 2.5 black people.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
If you have band-aids all over your feet like that it's a sign from God telling you to take the heels off already. :( That outfit is something else too.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
In my town they have Safe-Ride, which is free. There is also this service where someone will drive you and your car to your house for a small fee. You just have to live within city limits. They can drive you and your car home because they bring a foldable scooter that they put in the trunk of your car and then drive it from your house.
As for Amanda she is hitting rock Lohan. I also think that her Twatter about preferring black peen may have been just for attention. I say that because don't the Elite Hollywood clubs only let in 2.5 black people. Exception celebities of a certain caliber. I remember seeing vids of Aries Spears from MADtv and Craig Robinson from The Office getting denied entrance to the Hollywood clubs.
I was flipping through the channels the other night and All That came on. She was so cute when she was little & it is a shame she is turning into blohan
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"Independent films are those black and white hippy movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." - Eric Cartman
“Just be careful you don’t wind up naked and jacking it in San Diego.” - South Park
❥
www.hendricksboards.com
Submitted by guest on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:20pm.
No Whamo you may not. You have to stay on dlisted for the rest of the afternoon.
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WHAT!!!! That's not fair ALL the other kids get to go to TMZ!!
I hate you I hate you I hate you!!!
*slams thread runs to my room*
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Submitted by WithinReason... on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:31pm.
Whamo, I CANNOT be your mom, and you know very well why!!!! Lollolllollllolol ;p
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LOL!! ;)
Hopefully she won't kill anybody else when she inevitably collides with another car. People like this shouldn't be allowed to drive.
"Either find a sober trick to go home with or drag yourself to the nearest Denny's and face plant right into a stack of pancakes until you're good enough to drive."
GOSPEL.
Also, did Amanda Bynes always have those chipmunk cheeks? Oooohhweee.....wusssup wit dat?
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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:32pm.
Hoffalina - after she bailed out of the drunk tank she went right back to the same bar to party on. She were DENIED by staff.
Train-WRECK!
She's living in the wrong fucking state, man.
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I have never loved life so much.
Athina, if they say something to me, I say, "You name ONE THING that is safe about what you are doing, and I will shut up. ONE."
They never can.
Fuck you, risking MY LIFE because YOU want to answer a text or email. FUCK YOU.
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People say believe half of what you see
Son, and none of what you hear
But I can't help being confused
If it's true please tell me dear
Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:40pm.
I'm kinda guilty of reading while driving but only when I'm in bumper to bumper traffic. I won't do it barreling down the road, I know that's no excuse but what can I say I'm a dopey guy.
Pfft. That's nothing.
Submitted by agirl on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:26pm.
I am on the Beej Cruiser advisory board myself.
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you are BAD... me likey.
and LMAO at making it RAAAAAAAAIN up in herrrr
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"You reap what you fuck." ~ RichBitch 03/13/2012
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 2:28pm.
I want to fucking punch people I see texting while driving.
I do yell at people.
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I do that too. I can always tell who's texting because they're either all up in my lane, or they're driving 20 miles below the limit because they are looking at their phone. I get beside those bitches and blow my horn while giving them serious road rage face.
Hoffalina - after she bailed out of the drunk tank she went right back to the same bar to party on. She were DENIED by staff.
Train-WRECK!
Whamo, I CANNOT be your mom, and you know very well why!!!! Lollolllollllolol ;p
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"Ayúdame, no puedo!" - MK
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Oh, I am sooooo enjoying watching this trainwreck of a little skank blossoming into Lohan Part Deux.
Wait.. she got a DUI and is back driving one week later? bitch, not in ohio you're not!
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I have never loved life so much.
I want to fucking punch people I see texting while driving.
I do yell at people.
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People say believe half of what you see
Son, and none of what you hear
But I can't help being confused
If it's true please tell me dear
No Whamo you may not. You have to stay on dlisted for the rest of the afternoon.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Was she driving in those shoes??? I've never been able to drive in heels.
The band-aids are nasty!
Great legs though.
At this point she's just doing it for attention. She's following the not-true-at-all policy of "there's no such thing as bad publicity." Yes there is.
Submitted by guest on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:46pm.
Whamo! *grounds you*
Submitted by WithinReason... on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:43pm.
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You are both right and I really have no excuse. I'll try and be better Moms:)
Can I go out and play now, I promise I won't leave the yard!
Whamo! *grounds you*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:27pm.
This is the genius who drove drunk and side swiped a police car while trying to pass it, right. Stupid bitch. I wouldn't miss you or do the DListed "I can't stop crying!" act should you try to pass a concrete barrier going 80. Oh Porsche Girl!
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HA! Ok, I officially love this post.
*pictures "porsche girl"*
Not worth it Whamo, I ignore my work blackberry or turn it off! It's bad news to even be distracted by the chirp!! Careful!
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"Ayúdame, no puedo!" - MK
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Lucifer_Sam's picture
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 12:48pm.
"Unfortunately "celebrity culture" is such that it's better to be known for being a trainwreck than not to be known at all. Looks like that's what she's going for because, really, who remembered she existed before her DUI?"
i am convinced that within the past month there was a blind item here or on Blind Gossip (i don't read CDAN or TedC) that some desperate former tween star was going to try to out-Lohan Lohan for publicity -> reality show -> comeback -> profit. does anyone else remember reading this?
ETA: actually i think it was bad publicity -> rehab-> reality show-> etc. etc.
Because if so? This bitch.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
I'm kinda guilty of reading while driving but only when I'm in bumper to bumper traffic. I won't do it barreling down the road, I know that's no excuse but what can I say I'm a dopey guy.
LOL @ fitchu agirl!
Weezy...a halter with no sides! Ita..not cute.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Even tho when I was in hs I did drink & drive thinking I drove better intoxicated...NO. Once I pulled out of b&r & this car hit the corner of my bumper & spun my ass around in a 360. Scary.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:27pm.
EWWWWWWW. Not Porsche girl again!!!!!!!
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I'm jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo - Blanche Devereaux
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 12:55pm.
Oxy - damn girl!! yea, they say their service is "free" but they expect tips... I tip em at least $20 when I get a ride and they know I will continue to tip... A cab ride from downtown to my apt is only $10... the main reason I tip them 20 is so when I call the next time, they bump me to the front of the line so I never have to wait... The last time a buddy and I used them we tipped em $50 because they stopped by a local diner to let us pick up breakfast.
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I can confirm that Jack is a good tipper.
But he only tips with single dollar bills and he likes to throw them in the air, saying something about "rain"(?)
Ahahahahahahaha ME!!! Spell check makes the goofs even stupider... "Hey baboon, you wanna flock?"
My neighbor's son died in an auto accident last month. He was only nineteen and a very smart kid. He was in Dentistry school. He was texting while driving , went off the road and hit a tree. He tested negative for drugs or alcohol . So very, very sad.
This is the genius who drove drunk and side swiped a police car while trying to pass it, right. Stupid bitch. I wouldn't miss you or do the DListed "I can't stop crying!" act should you try to pass a concrete barrier going 80. Oh Porsche Girl!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 12:40pm.
We have a service here called Boozer Cruiser... call them when you are drunk and they will pick you up (they only run on the weekend since they have normal jobs and volunteer their time picking up booze hounds). It's pretty cool. I know them on a first name basis.
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LOL @ "first name basis"!
I am on the Beej Cruiser advisory board myself.
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:19pm.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/13/2012 - 1:16pm.
I don't text and drive, it gets in the way of my masturbation.
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"Bwahahahahahahah!"
Bwahahahahahahah times two!
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"We are here on earth to do good for others.
What the others are here for, I don't know."
W.H. Auden
If you need a whole box of bandaids on your feets to wear your shoes, that means they DO NOT FITCHU, girl!
She's just a mess from all angles, aint she?
whoever this middle-aged woman is, she thinks she's found a way to get attention
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.